Writer’s Block from Lack of Freedom

OK… I’ll admit it.

I can’t write like I used to.

When I was 22-23 (i.e. the year 2003), I could write angsty entries about pretty much any subject and I rarely had the writer’s block I do now. I wrote about politics, religion, current events, etc with no problem whatsoever. These days… I can’t really write about anything because I have to self-censor. There’s this fear that someone from one of Jon’s churches is going to find the blog and out me or that some future employer is going to google me and find it or the admissions people at whatever grad school I attend are going to use this blog as an excuse to deny me entrance.

Dude… the synod pastor in SW MN Synod described this site as “further evidence of self-destructive behavior on [my] part” after some people at MN Church #1 found it and used it to get at Jon. Like I can really blog out feelings here now?

A lot of my friends who are my age are giving up their blogs, trimming down their online presences, or just not writing as much. Many are adopting passworded sites if they’re going to write and it seems like the carefreeness that we all enjoyed 3 years ago is gone because people are now using whatever we write as a basis for employment or as a way to get into our business.

Am I the only one feeling this way?

Lack of Postings

OK… my lack of posting for the last week has been due to all my creative juices going toward NaNoWriMo.Â? I’m at almost 35K words which is a bit ahead of schedule (and ahead of everyone on my writing buddies list and their writing buddies lists) and I think I could probably be writing even more if not for that pesky thing called “sleep”.Â? Oh yeah… also the “eating/drinking/spending time with Jon” thing.

Let’s see… in the last week: I did volunteer training at the local prison to do religious activities there, attended a Veteran’s Day pancake supper (thank goodness for the buttermilk pancakes in addition to the sourdough ones) and program (unfortunately, I didn’t stay for part of the program — long story), did youth group stuff on Sunday, and did a puzzle at coffee yesterday.

Oh… and for the record, I’m now part of Fantasy Congress. Jigzone.Com is also mental crack.


A couple things:

  • Mi amigo Eric is marrying his bride Amy.Â? My brother is one of the best men (there are 2).Â? Congrats you two!
  • I’m over 10,000 words for NaNoWriMo which means that being sleepy today isn’t going involve me catching up a ton over the next few days.Â? It’s been good to see how much I’ve been able to just let everything flow.Â? Hopefully, it continues this way.

Halloween and NaNoWriMo

Halloween:Â? Well… I gave two pumpkins a lobotomy and carved up their shells into cat-o-lanterns.Â? It was about 4F last night which means that we had almost no trick-or-treaters.Â? Those who came were cute.Â? :)Â? I ran into two of my church kids and their dad down at the co-op this afternoon and told them that they needed to come up and get their candy!Â? (I was sad not to see them last night because I’m fond of these guys.)
Nanowrimo:Â? I’m doing it this year.Â? I have about 3400 words as I type this entry and it’s the first day.Â? W00t!

My piece is a murder mystery called “Minnesota Ice” and I’m killing off people I don’t like in it (not by their real names of course) as well as those of my freakish online friends who have asked to die as well.Â? (You know who you are.)Â? And no, I’m not taking requests to kill anyone else off.Â? I already have about 10 people who I need to kill creatively.Â? :)Â? *waves to the nice NSA people who are probably going to shut down this site*
As for who gets a copy at the end of the month, I’m gonna do it this way.Â? Email me if you want a manuscript and if I know you/trust you/do not live within a 40 mile radius of you, I’ll send you a link to my whatgoesaround.org givelist.Â? Make a donation to a charity on that list (I don’t care how much, just give something), send me your confirmation of that (leave off credit card numbers and all that), and I’ll email you a *.zip file of the story.Â? My reasons for this: I get to control who sees the story and some people in need get helped in the process.

Any questions?