31 Days of My World As It Is Sung: The Simple Woman’s Daybook for October 15, 2017

For Today… October 15, 2017

Simple Woman's Daybook

Looking out my window… dark. It was in the low 60’s F this afternoon when we were sitting out and talking before Sunday dinner. It was really mostly in the 50’s F today with the exception of that time.

I am thinking… about the assignments I have due this week. It’s not a bad load but I do need to get it done. Mostly, I need to do Skype stuff with one of my Electronic Communications teammates before Saturday.

I am thankful… for my nap this afternoon. It was heavenly, even if it meant my PE reading didn’t get done before Sunday dinner.

One of my favorite things… sleep. I’m wishing I was asleep instead of up with the kiddo getting a late night snack.

I am wearing… jammies. Church clothes were a long-sleeved charcoal heather shirt, black slacks, my black flats, and my grey hoodie because it ended up being cold in the church.

I am creating… discussion posts for PE, this entry, and reports for my Sage class.

I am listening to… the sound of the Cheerios scraping against Daniel’s bowl.

I am hoping… for a productive day tomorrow.

I am learning… best practices for Skype and video-conferencing.

In my kitchen… Dad made pasta, sauce, meatballs, and salad tonight. Mom contributed an apple pie with apples from the family orchard in Burlington.

In the school room… Daniel’s class gets to go to the pumpkin patch next week!

Shared Quote… “Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” – Oscar Wilde

Hosted by The Simple Woman.

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung: Pouring from My Empty Cup

While I was living with my former in-laws, my (hopefully soon-to-be) former mother-in-law made the suggestion that I could start a ministry for families with kids with special needs in Jon’s next parish. When I told her why that was really not a good idea, she was less than pleased and told me that I was being incredibly selfish.

Huh.

A year later, I was fighting bout #2 of bronchitis which was caused partially by the stress of ending my marriage. My parents were out of town and my idiot PA told me he wanted to admit me to the hospital immediately for Prednisone and antibiotics. When I told him that I couldn’t be admitted to the hospital because I had nobody to watch my child, he excoriated me for refusing the prednisone (which, by the way, IS BLACK-BOXED ON MY CHART FOR THE REACTION I HAVE TO IT!!!!!) and for refusing hospital admission, telling me that I had to take care of myself and learn to ask for help.

Huh.

What these two things have in common is that both of them assumed that I have far more in terms of resources than I actually had. My former mother-in-law assumed that I would have the emotional, mental, and physical resources to take care of Daniel at church AND several other kids with varying levels of special needs. In churches that have such ministries, THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS. You have rotating groups of people who are trained that take turns helping out one Sunday a month. You never ask the parents to be the ones doing it because Sunday worship might be the one time a week they get to replenish their emotional/mental reserves for the week.

My idiot PA assumed that I had people who could help and I was just refusing to ask. Yeah… if I had people who could take over my difficult child, DON’T YOU THINK I WOULD ASK?!?!?!? So many single mamas like me with difficult kids are frequently flying by the seat of our pants. Yes, my parents could take over… unless they’re not available and then I’m very much SOL. I had a control journal for Daniel and if I had been hooked up with the local Regional Center, I might have had a respite worker… but we were in the process of moving so I never got hooked up. So I was taking care of my kid and getting him to school on no sleep and I’d be coughing so badly I was puking while he was at school. I probably should have been hospitalized (no Prednisone though!) but I had no choice but to refuse. (My BFF and my tasoni both mothered me by remote control that week and it helped immensely.)

I wish the world could understand that a lot of us moms with special kiddos are pouring from empty cups, not because we want to, but because we have no other choice. I want Daniel at church with me but by the same token, church is one of those times when I try to fill my cup for the next week. I managed to get through church with him a few weeks ago… but that was because my priest and my parish surrounded me and supported me so I could be a lector and I could sing with the choir. People asked me what I needed and gave me grace when my kid didn’t act like they wanted him to. That helped me fill up my cup a little bit.

Pouring from an empty cup.

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung: The Simple Woman’s Daybook for October 8, 2017

For Today… October 8, 2017

Simple Woman's Daybook

Looking out my window… dark. It started out chilly today and got up to 63F around noon. It’s now down in the low 40’s.

I am thinking… about the publicity stunt the Vice-President pulled today. He needs to reimburse taxpayers for the money he wasted. My friends who are vets (Iraq and Afghanistan) think he and 45 are both tools and point out every freaking time they are asked that they served and fought to protect the athletes’ right to protest so THEY DON’T CARE.

I am thankful… for everything going well with worship today.

One of my favorite things… being warm. I haven’t been lately. For some odd reason, I can’t deal with the drop in temperatures — I don’t know if the house is just colder or what.

I am wearing… jammies. Church clothes were a berry-colored long-sleeved shirt from Old Navy, black slacks, and black flats. I switched out the slacks for jeans after church and spent the rest of the day usually barefoot.

I am creating… reports for Sage.

I am watching… the news.

I am hoping… Daniel sleeps through the night tonight.

I am learning… how to do transactions for a cash business in Sage

In my kitchen… I made beef stroganoff and noodles for Sunday dinner. Mom took care of the salad, beans, and pie.

In the school room… Daniel was asking to go to school when my alarm went off yesterday and today. It was adorable!

Post Script… the reason you tie shoelaces for people as a doctor.

Shared Quote… “When God created each of us, he tucked a little bit of his divine imagination into our souls. He did this, I think, so that we can conceive of the fact that our world contains so much more than we can see, feel, and touch.” — Hallie Lord

Hosted by The Simple Woman.

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung: Autism and Changelings

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung

Someone posted this picture on Facebook a few days ago and it resonated with me. I have friends with kiddos on the spectrum that are thoroughly convinced that their children are vaccine-injured based on when the autism manifested. It’s really hard for me to understand their viewpoint because I never had that normal child who was seemingly taken by fairies and replaced with a child who did not seem like mine. Not to mention, all of the peer-reviewed studies on vaccines and autism have come back saying that they don’t trigger it.

I think we need to be aware that microdeletions and genetic issues happen and we need to be open to the neurodiversity of people, rather than saying that people on the spectrum are damaged.

Autism and changelings.

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung: 7 Quick Takes on ADHD, Greek Food, and Other Fun Things

7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

ADHD anniversary. 2 years ago today, Daniel was diagnosed with ADHD and put on medication. As controversial as that decision was, it’s been a good one — he sleeps better at night (and goes to sleep on his own) and he can play independently.

— 2 —

Greek food. I made the comment at choir practice that I would give up Greek food in order to not have to deal with Seattle-Everett traffic. People started throwing out suggestions of closer options and I realized that I could go up to Bellingham. Apparently, there are several up there and there is also an Ethiopian restaurant. Yay!

— 3 —

An Epic issue. The local hospital system just got a new computer system which is kind of a pain in the butt. However, they sent me my code to login and sign myself up so I did that on Monday and got to populate my chart with information. It was geeky fun and I didn’t have to worry about transcription errors or Dragon Dictate problems or anything else that I’ve had to deal with in the past.

— 4 —

Special intention. Please pray for a special intention. Thanks!

— 5 —

Baseball take. So I know in the postseason, these will be the teams I support:
Cubs
Red Sox
Nationals
Diamondbacks

I can’t root for the Astros because they’re a Texas team (I LOVELOVELOVE messing with Texas), the Dodgers are the archenemies of my boys in San Francisco, the Yankees are evil, and I’m pretty sure the Indians made one with Satan again this year to get into the post season because… CLEVELAND SUCKS!!!!

— 6 —

NCAA football. My Huskies are at the top of the PAC-12 and 6th in the nation. Duuuuuude…

— 7 —

On a parting note… Here’s some amazing music and scenery.

For more Quick Takes, visit Kelly at This Ain’t The Lyceum.

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung: The Visit Itself

31 Days of My World As It Is Sung

I alluded to the visit to the Autism Center at Seattle Children’s Hospital yesterday and how we now have teams of people who want to help Daniel learn and grow.

Basically, the need for services is so high that the waiting list to get an appointment is over 12 MONTHS — not just to be seen but to just get the initial appointment. It’s in the U District of Seattle at the north edge of the University of Washington (Go Dawgs!) and, as we discovered, across the street from the University Village, which is an upscale shopping center. We got to the appointment an hour early (traffic is horrible so we left super early in case we got stuck on I-5 for 30 minutes because of an accident) so we went across the street to the first $tarbux my parents ever visited (this is the second store ever opened — my parents visited it when my dad was a grad student almost 50 years ago) and got coffee to kill some time.

When we got back, we visited with a psychiatric nurse practitioner for an hour, talking about every aspect of Daniel’s case from birth to present. We left with referrals for ABA, peds gastroenterology at Seattle Children’s Hospital, the UW Center for Pediatric Dentistry, outside speech therapy (in addition to what he gets in school), a DDA application, and some other information. When we get the clinic note next week, we’ll be hooked up with people who can help us get all these services established. Given that I’ve been kind of having to figure all of this out myself for the most part (people can tell me about stuff but getting services established is a whole other ball game), I am so unbelievably happy that I’ll have people helping me whose job is to help me.

The best thing: dealing with people who can use the actual correct biological terminology to describe WHY my kid is on the spectrum, has ADHD, and has developmental delays (other than his prematurity). Given my dealings with anti-vaxxers who believe in the conspiracy theories spouted by the quack and fraud Dr. Andrew Wakefield and disgraced pediatrician Dr. Bob Sears (who will, God willing, be losing his license shortly for gross negligence), it’s so wonderful to deal with intelligent people.