You Know You’re From Silicon Valley When…

Your combined household income is $140,000 and you can’t afford shoes for the kids

You think anything slower than DSL is barbaric, but can’t get it in your neighborhood

You know what DSL stands for

You and your spouse almost come to blows deciding to hit Peet’s or Starbucks

You think that American food includes sushi, naan, pho, pesto and pad thai

You met your neighbors once

When asked about your commute you answer in time, not distance

Even though you work 80 hours per week on a computer, for relaxation you read your email and peruse eBay

You have worked at the same job for a year and people call you an ‘old-timer’

The T-shirts you value most were for products that never made it to market

You can name four different programming languages and you are not a programmer

You remember the names of the three closest cheap sushi joints, the location of all the Fry’s in the area and which companies your friends work for that are going public in the next year, but don’t know the name of the mayor

Standing in line at Starbucks you wonder why the employees don’t call a head hunter

You work 6 miles from your home and spend two hours a day commuting and $40 a week on gas

Winter is when your lawn grows too fast and summer is when it dies

The median price of a house is $500,000…for 1200 sq. ft. with no yard because it’s a town house

You live on some of the richest farm land in the world but most of what you eat comes from South America on a boat

Your best friend lives across town but you hardly ever see each other because after your commute you’re too pooped to spend another hour driving to their home

You have a master’s degree in engineering but half the people in your department either didn’t go to college or have history degrees, except if you have a master’s from Stanford, in which case everyone in your department has a master’s degree from Stanford

You cringe when you see people in suits at your office, wondering if someone in management will make you stop wearing bunny slippers

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