Category Archives: Faith

Prayers for Discernment

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A few people have suggested to me that I should possibly go back to school and re-train as a nurse because I have the skills for it. I’m open to this but there are some things standing in the way of me doing this:

-Daniel’s needs at the moment
-the fact that I don’t know how long we’ll be in this current parish

Could those of you who pray please pray for me as I discern all of this? There’s a part of me that wants to do it NOW(!!!!!!!) but I know that this isn’t totally possible at this exact moment.

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: July 11, 2011

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Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY July 11, 2011

Outside my window… cooler than it’s been. I think it was in the low 80’s today. It beats 105 any day!

I am thinking… about what I have left on my Daniel list this week. Today was multiple doctor’s appointments.

I am thankful… that the resident Daniel saw today for his well-child check-up was one of the ones who was in the PICU with us. She was overjoyed to see him healthy, having seen him the night when he was almost put on ECMO. I like her and asked for her to be the one with whom Daniel will follow up next month.

From the learning rooms… baby sign language. Daniel knows the sign for “more” — he just doesn’t want to do it. He’ll make the sign with my fingers instead.

In the kitchen… nothing super complicated.

I am wearing… light blue v-neck shit from Lady Foot Locker and sweats.

I am creating… entries for Michelle.

I am going… to Sacramento for Daniel’s speech therapy tomorrow, to WIC on Wednesday, and out with my church ladies on Wednesday night.

I am wondering… why drivers on Highway 99 are so stupid.

I am reading… The Year of Living Biblically by A.J. Jacobs.

I am hoping… WIC isn’t too awful and that wherever it is can handle Daniel in a stroller.

I am looking forward to… Ladies’ Night Out for church on Wednesday.

I am hearing… the fan in the bedroom and Qubo on TV in the living room.

Around the house… still relatively clean.

I am pondering… too many things to list at the moment.

One of my favorite things… my massage last Wednesday. I needed it. BADLY.

A few plans for the rest of the week… speech tomorrow, WIC and Ladies’ Night Out on Wednesday, and nothing the rest of the week God-willing.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing… Daniel playing pattycake with my mom.

Daniel and Grandma playing pattycake.

Hosted by The Simple Woman’s Daybook

7 Quick Takes: Admissions That Will Make Me Lose Readers

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7 Quick Takes

I’ve been pondering the idea of doing this for awhile. Here are seven admissions that will probably cause me to lose readers. None of these are open to debate — they’re things that are part of me or decisions I’ve made after careful consideration and consultation with professionals.

–1–

I take birth control pills. I can see the Catholic readers from Jen’s site fleeing as well as some of my readers who are staunchly anti-contraception. Before people start lecturing me on the state of my soul, I should probably explain a few things. Firstly, I mainly take them because my PMS is so severe that it can land me in bed during that week. After Daniel’s birth, I also started having hot flashes and dizzy spells. The pills moderate out my hormones so that I can be functional. Secondly, me pregnant is *NOT* a good thing. I would be on bed rest for 9 months and that’s not a viable option at the moment with Daniel needing so much of my time and care. I’m married to someone who works insane hours so I’m pretty much it as far as the person who can take care of him, arrange his therapies, and verbally abuse argue with insurance/SSA/Medicaid. Lastly, having a huge family is not a good choice for me with the fibromyalgia — the fatigue and pain make keeping up with Daniel hard enough. I know the risks of being on the Pill and with my (thoroughly Catholic) doctor’s help in Montana, we found one that had the fewest side effects for me. I also go in for my exams like clockwork so I’m at least being monitored.

–2–

I would rather pull my fingernails AND toenails out with pliers than vote for any current Republican candidate. The idea of Sarah Palin as president makes me want to repatriate myself to another country… like maybe Afghanistan. Michelle Bachmann is just as scary. None of the others are any better and because I live in California, I live in fear of almost putting the state up on eBay (Meg Whitman) or selling it to HP (Carly Fiorina). The only positive for the loser who represents my district in Congress (Dan Lungren) is that he’s put forth a bill to make it a felony to shine a laser at a plane.

–3–

I honestly want to vomit or throw something at the TV whenever John Boehner or Mitch McConnell (especially him) come on. Maybe it’s just me but I think that it’s positively ludicrous to have two white men who are independently wealthy and will have fat government pensions upon leaving Congress decide my healthcare needs and how important Medicare/Social Security are. I’m seriously praying that Obama wins in 2012 because it’s the only shot I feel like I have to get adequate medical coverage when companies stop being able to discriminate in 2014. I also have a kid who receives SSI and Medicaid and without those, we’d be up a creek without a paddle. All those therapies cost money and we couldn’t afford them if we didn’t have government help. I also just feel like Boehner and McConnell don’t give a rat’s butt about the people that actually *NEED* the services they want to cut and are just playing partisan games.

–4–

I hate summer. Where I live, it can be in the 90-100 degrees F range easily and I just don’t want to go outside when it’s that hot. Additionally, I’m fair-skinned and I burn if I even think about the sun. I’d be better suited to the Pacific Northwest than the part of northern California where I live. Unfortunately, this weather can stretch into October so I have at least another three months of hell before things hit a reasonable temperature.

–5–

I think that Rick Warren’s book, The Purpose-Driven Live is a piece of pop culture crap. Many people swear by it. I’d prefer to swear at it. It’s pop culture drivel like Joel Osteen and it does positively nothing for my faith. I tried reading it and had to stop at Day 32, by which point my copy was beaten to a pulp from me throwing it across the room multiple times a day.

–6–

I can’t stand the sound of kids crying or whining in church. This makes it doubly hard with Daniel because he’s at an age where he isn’t going to sit still and he wants to pick up everything, shred papers, and crawl down the aisle. I simply can’t keep up with him most of the time and I feel like people who tell me that they don’t mind the screaming are lying to make me feel better. Thus, I’m not making it to church much these days. (I’ve also had personal illness, family emergencies, and other things preventing me.) I’m going to talk to my church ladies this Wednesday to find a solution for this.

–7–

I have no desire to see the Harry Potter movies. I’ve read all seven books multiple times and seen the first three movies. It bugs me when the movie doesn’t follow the plot of the book which made movie #3 an annoyance to me.

(For more quick takes, go see Jen at ConversionDiary.Com.)

A Guest Blogging Opportunity

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I thought I’d throw this out for my Catholic readers: Michelle at Catholic Unveiled is going on a 4-month mission trip to Mexico and needs some guest posts. I volunteered (even though I’m Lutheran) and I’ll be sending her a few. If you’re interested, here is the post where you can get information.

(I think she’d take non-Catholics as well but the topics are along a Catholic vein.)

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: July 4, 2011

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Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY July 4, 2011

Outside my window… bloody hot. We’re having a heat wave in northern California as usually happens about this time (late June/early July).

I am thinking… about that which awaits me in my week.

I am thankful for… time with my parents this long weekend and for the massage I have scheduled for Wednesday. (We’re talking medical necessity here, not Jen spoiling herself.) Also thankful that Daniel doesn’t have speech therapy tomorrow — I love Easter Seals and I don’t mind driving into Sacramento for speech; but I’m thankful to not have the appointment at 8:45 a.m. because it means that the little boy and I can snuggle and watch cartoons together. (It also means no drive into Sacramento in rush-hour traffic.)

From the kitchen… pesto… and lots of it.

I am wearing… my light blue “Preeclampsia survivor” shirt and jeans shorts.

I am creating… this entry.

I am going… back up to Gold Country this afternoon/evening.

I am reading… The Year of Living Biblically by A.J. Jacobs. I just finished Quiverfull by Kathryn Joyce and am happy to be done with it, especially after reading some of the ideas people had about the evils of c-sections (kids born to Satan — gee thanks… it wasn’t like there was much of a choice in my case) and about birth politics.

I am hoping… for a relatively calm week. I’m also hoping that Daniel’s cold doesn’t turn into an ear infection.

I am hearing… my dad watching a movie that seems to be a cross between Glee and Fame Glee. OK… serious questions being raised here — my dad usually watches things that involve cursing and/or things being blown up. My mind is being blown here.

Around the house… bookcases from IKEA to be put together.

One of my favorite things… Crystal Light on a hot day.

A few plans for the rest of the week: no speech therapy tomorrrow and possibly no physical therapy. Massage on Wednesday morning. I also need to drop off records at UC Davis Pediatrics at some point.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing… Daniel in his cupboard at my parents’ house.

Daniel in his cupboard.

Hosted by The Simple Woman’s Daybook

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: June 27, 2011

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Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY June 27, 2011

Outside my window… icky and hot. They’re claiming it’s only 80 but I don’t believe them.

I am thinking… about the new SSI mess (the idiot at SSA faxed Daniel’s Medicaid to the wrong county) and about the meeting with Easter Seals this afternoon.

I am thankful for… the nap I got this morning.

From the kitchen… my own turkey sub.

I am wearing… a coffee-colored polo shirt and khaki capris.

I am creating… this entry.

I am going… to Trader Joe’s for more basil plants and probably Target for snail bait.

I am reading… Quiverfull by Kathryn Joyce. Yep… ploughing ahead even though I skipped the majority of chapter 8 because I didn’t want to hear about people advocating the proof-texting of Biblical verses as an excuse to beat and kill their wives.

I am hoping… we can get this SSI mess sorted out soon.

I am hearing… PBS kids in the living room and Daniel eating Cheerios next to me.

Around the house… I had to move stuff out of the bottom drawer of our filing cabinet because Daniel was going after it.

One of my favorite things… ice-cold Capri Sun juice packs.

A few plans for the rest of the week: therapies for Daniel and heading to my parents’ house on Friday for the long weekend so Jon can organize his study.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing… the hands of Daniel, me, and Jon

3 hands.

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Utterly Repulsed

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I’m reading Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement by Kathryn Joyce and it’s proving to be an *interesting* read. I knew a number of people who were raised in this environment, several of whom (Elizabeth Esther and Young Mom) who are now blogging about the damage done by people in that movement.

Chapter 7 is on Michael and Debi Pearl of No Greater Joy Ministries (not linking them for reasons that will become obvious) but focuses mostly on Debi’s advice on “submitting to one’s husband”. The Pearls are known most widely in the media for their child-abusing manual To Train Up a Child which has been linked to several cases in which people beat their children (some only babies) to death under the influence of the Pearls. The chapter touches briefly on this but mainly focuses on Debi’s psychopathic advice to women.

Here’s an excerpt. (**WARNING** Reading this may be a trigger for abused women.)

A woman who writes to complain that her husband’s TV-watching is exposing the family to bad influences is warned that the social circle for divorced women with children is painfully small and that the job they’ll be forced to take will leave the kids in the hands of a fornicating baby-sitter. Other single mothers, Debi suggests, end up with bad haircuts and cheap clothes, pooling resources with other divorcees and becoming lesbians; they live in fear of eviction and violence from their exes and are only courted by men who aim to molest their children. When they get breast cancer, Debi writes, there will be no one around to care for them, and it’s all because they got high and mighty about the TV. “Listen to me, young mother. Do not play the fool. You don’t know how bad it can get.”
–p. 96

I kid you not. I almost vomited up what I was eating when I read that. I read it to Jon and he had the same reaction. What kind of psychopathic crap is that?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
It gets better as Debi admonishes women that their submission involves “reverencing” one’s husband — monitoring their food/drink at dinner (to refill their cup or plate), being present for any and all sexual duties the husband requests, and blaming women if their husbands’ eyes wander. (They’re apparently not catering to their husbands enough.)

She also advises women who are being physically abused by their husbands to try and love them back to the Lord. She tells the story of a woman whose husband stabbed her in the stomach when she was expecting their third child and how she told her to leave her husband if she *had to* but instead to “wage an all-out campaign to win his heart by refusing to bring the stories of his abuse to their church or her family again, reverencing him by keeping his ‘flaws’ hidden.” (p. 101) Apparently, her fellow psychopath-by marriage — I mean husband is ignoring his role as a mandated reporter (which is the law in all 50 states if he’s a pastor) because this kind of abuse cannot be kept from the police. In fact, most states have domestic violence laws that would require the woman to press charges. But anyway… WHAT KIND OF GOD DO THESE [insert unmentionable word] PEOPLE PEOPLE WORSHIP THAT CONDONES A MAN BEATING HIS WIFE AND EXPECTS HER TO TAKE IT JOYFULLY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? It sure isn’t the God I worship — that’s for darn sure! It’s a completely anti-biblical attitude. The oft-quoted passage in Ephesians 5 states “husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church?? for we are members of his body.” (Ephesians 5:25-30, NIV)

Add in Pearl’s admonishments against having female friends (apparently isolation and loneliness breed desire for one’s husband) and you have a worldview where women are essentially the property of their husbands and forced to depend on them solely for emotional support and physical well-being. (Keep the women isolated and they won’t cry “ABUSE!!!!!”) According to the evil Pearl, “when God puts you in subjection to a man whom he knows is going to cause you to suffer, it is with the understanding that you are obeying God by enduring the wrongful suffering.” (p. 101) Yeah.. I personally would be divorcing the [insert unmentionable word] and getting massive alimony as well as a restraining order and sole custody of my children. Again… WHAT KIND OF GOD DO THESE [insert unmentionable word] PEOPLE PEOPLE WORSHIP THAT CONDONES THIS CRAP?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Pearl is apparently not the only so-called “religious authority” spouting this crap. James Dobson is also guilty of this (surprise surprise) as is John MacArthur who only advocated women leaving their husbands for a limited time “while the heat is on” but with the intent of returning when the violence has cooled. (pp. 102-103) Dobson is a grade-A moron (listing the reasons is another post entirely) so it doesn’t surprise me that he believes that women “seek abuse for the ‘moral advantage’ that a black eye gives them as a ‘martyr’ in the relationship.” (p. 102) MacArthur, however, surprises me because he’s relatively well-liked in the evangelical community so I guess I assumed that he wouldn’t be so deluded as to think that it’s completely acceptable for a man to beat his woman for not submitting.

If the rest of chapter 8 is like this (the idiocy of Dobson and MacArthur), I may have to skip the rest of the chapter. I honestly can’t stomach this as it goes against EVERYTHING I believe with regard to God being love and how I should be “submitting to my husband”. It’s this kind of garbage that gives ammo to atheists and others to claim how hateful Christianity is.

If you’ll excuse me, I think I’m going to go puke again from disgust.