31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: A Day in My Life with Daniel

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

I thought it might be a good idea to show you what my day with Daniel looks like at the moment so you can get a sense of his routine, etc. I’ll be updating throughout the day so stop back every so often. πŸ™‚ Oh yeah, I also use military time because it’s easier for me.

0100: I’ve been on Facebook with a friend needing someone to talk to and Daniel is now awake. Once I’m off of Facebook messenger, he looks at me and tells me, “I want cookie.” Fine. I tell him to go downstairs to the kitchen and I grab my phone on the way out of my bedroom in case he wants to stay down there a while. The Benadryl I took for my allergies is kicking in and I’m pretty sleepy.

0120: We’re back upstairs and Daniel hunkers down on my bed with his blankies. (Making him go back to his own bed is not a battle I’m choosing to fight when I’m feeling this crappy.) I put on a Viperkeeper video on Youtube and drift off to sleep.

0547: I’m woken up by the presence of a small child standing over my side of the bed and asking for a cookie. Fine. (This kid has a BMI of 13 so if he wants food these days, he gets it.) We go downstairs and I pray for Daniel to eat fast. He finishes quickly and I hand him his tablet, admonish him not to get up until my alarm goes off, and I go back to sleep.

0715: My sadistic alarm clock goes off and I drag myself out of bed. Daniel is already coming around the side of my bed to turn it off and I tell him to head to his room to get dressed. I grab my Jameson fleece and put it on because it is freezing in the house. The heat might have been on since 5 or 6 a.m. but it doesn’t seem to have made a difference.

0718: Next door in Daniel’s room, I monitor the dressing process. We take off his jammies, change his training pants, and I hand him clothes to put on for Picture Day (a navy blue polo shirt, a long-sleeved navy blue shirt to layer underneath, and jeans). Thankfully, he’s not feeling like messing around this morning and dresses quickly. I use part of the time he’s getting dressed to grab a cough drop off my desk.

0728: Daniel is dressed and I’ve had a chance to go to the bathroom so it’s time to head downstairs. I grab his glasses, a Windex wipe (for his glasses), his ID bracelet, his backpack, and his morning meds before limping down the stairs. My left knee is stiff and painful if I put weight on it so I’m predicting that today will be a day when I’ll be wanting a lot of Flexeril. Unfortunately, I can’t take it immediately because I’ve got a lot to do and the pill makes me a bit drowsy.

0734: Daniel is sitting at the table eating goldfish and drinking milk. I grab a spoon from the drawer and Daniel’s medicinal peanut butter jar (plain creamy peanut butter that we use for giving him his meds every day) from the pantry so I can give him his Adderall XR with a spoonful of the peanut butter. I’m thankful that he’s taking it without a fight now because it used to take my mom restraining him and me prying his jaws open to get him to take his meds. He takes the spoon from me and swallows it quickly so I give him 3 M&M’s for complying.

0736: Now that the kiddo is medicated, I pack his lunch. It’s pretty much the same every day and with the dry foods already in his lunch bag, I just have to add two cheese sticks, a banana, and his travel cup of juice.

0740: Daniel puts on his glasses and I put in his hearing aids. I thought I had brought his ID bracelet downstairs with me, but it’s not on the kitchen table with everything else. I limp back upstairs and find it next to the drying can for his hearing aids. I limp back downstairs and fasten it to him.

0746: Now that he has everything on besides his socks and shoes, I check his communication book to see if his teacher has anything to say. I fill out the back of the paper and pack the book into his backpack with his lunch and everything else.

0748: “Socks on, shoes on, Daniel.” While he puts his socks and shoes on, I head upstairs to grab my laundry from last night out of the dryer and put it on my Rubbermaid bin to fold once my bed is made and I have a big enough surface to work.

0750: Daniel is ready about 10 minutes before the bus arrives so I hand him his tablet and let him play after we get his jacket on.

0758: *beep beep* The bus is here (we get door-to-door transportation) and I step into my flip-flops before heading outside with him. I hand his backpack to the bus aide, give Daniel a kiss, tell him that I love him, and tell him to be *EXTRA* cute today. He gets on the bus and I head back into the house.

0806: My bed is made and I start folding my laundry. I only have three pairs of long pants so I have to do laundry a few times a week. I need to go to Fred Meyer or Kohl’s and pick up a couple more pairs.

0820: After putting all my laundry away, I toss on a long-sleeved black shirt and jeans. I sit down to journalize all of the goings-on this morning.

0845: I look down at my Fitbit Surge and see that it’s time to head to church for Mary’s Guild (women’s Bible study). I decide to finish blogging about the morning later on and stick my laptop in my laptop bag with all my Excel books. I am down the stairs, shoes are on, and am walking out the door when I realize that I forgot my crocheting. I limp upstairs and my mom happens to be on the 2nd floor landing. She asks me why I’m limping and I explain that my left knee is being spazzy. I grab my yarn, prayer shawl that is in-progress, and head back downstairs to leave. Before I leave the house, I grab two Babybel cheese rounds and put my coffee order into the $tarbux mobile app so it will be ready when I get there. (I cannot express how much I love the mobile app. It enables me to order ahead of time and then just walk in and pick up my order, completely forgoing the line all together.)

0853: I make it to $tarbux. Skagit PUD is still doing roadwork on Division Street and at the entrance to the back way out of my neighborhood so I am delayed by having to slow down for that. Thankfully, I was waved through the roadblock and do not have to stop for any length of time. I get smiles and waves from the baristas at $tarbux when I pick my drink up at the bar. I made a mental note to tip them well.

0903 I make it to church and walk into the fellowship hall. Several of the women and Helen, our rector, are already there and I get hugs from all of them. A couple of them comment on my froggy voice as we’re standing around getting our coffee and I explain that it’s probably allergies but it could be what Daniel had last week. Eventually, we sit down and share whatever food people have brought. This morning, there were grapes, nuts, and tangerines. We talk about anything and everything going on in our lives, in the community, the readings for Sunday, and whatever is relevant. Partway through, I start having the moving fibro pain in my legs and to avoid crying, I get up and walk around a bit, hoping that stretching out my legs will help.

1100: I bid my ladies “adieu” and drive to school. I decide to take the long way so I can get some prayer time in. Usually if I go this way, I pray the Trisagion but today’s prayer is just me begging God to make the pain go away and to help me persevere through until I can go home. I end up going through some wooded areas and am heartened to see that the storms from last weekend did not take all the leaves off the trees. The fall colors here remind me so much of how brilliant they were when I lived in Ohio from 2001 to 2003.

1115: I arrive at school and try to find a parking space near the front. No luck. I try not to grimace as I walk to the computer lab in Ford Hall to work on my Excel assessments. I log into my favorite computer and spread out across a couple workstations so I can listen to music and charge my laptop battery while I work. The assessments go relatively well and I finish a little before noon.

1200: I leave Ford Hall and head to the coffee shop in the student center where I get a wrap and a Coke for lunch. I have some time to kill before I meet with my conversation partner so I eat half of the wrap and work on typing up some of this entry. There are various people from CCF scattered around the student center having one-on-one mentoring meetings and they wave to me as they pass my table.

1230: I head to the International Student Office to meet up with my conversation partner. She tells me that she has had to drop one of her English classes, the one that required having a conversation partner, and she can no longer meet with me because of a new job. I smile nicely, tell her that it was nice to get a chance to get to know her, and wish her the best. I head back to the coffee shop and sit back down at my old table. I put my earbuds in and listen to music while working on this entry until one of the young women from CCF sits down at my table. We talk a little bit about ministry, Daniel, and I ask her some questions about the internship she is doing with her church. We hang out until I have to head back to Ford Hall to see my Excel professor during her office hours.

1330: I knock on the door of K, my Excel professor and she answers it once she is done meeting with the student in her office. I tell her that one of the online assessments fouled up and docked me points on last week’s chapter so she brings up the assessment, looks at it, looks at me, asks me to demonstrate something for her, and gives me full credit on that particular assessment. I thank her and walk back to my car.

1405: I get home from school, drop my laptop bag in my room, stick the other half of my wrap in the fridge, and wait for Daniel to get home. Usually, he gets out of school at 3 and home at 4; but because of parent-teacher conferences, they’re getting out early this week.

1415: Daniel is home. We head upstairs to take off the hearing aids, glasses, and ID bracelet. He settles on my bed with his tablet and I go let my mom know that I’m going to take a warm shower to see if it helps with the congestion and the fibro pain.

1445: I’m out of the shower and in my jammies. While I showered, Daniel had a banana for a snack downstairs with my mom. Mom and I talk about whether it would be a good idea for me to be at my grandma’s party this weekend (her 96th birthday is today) and we decide to play it by ear but that we probably will not have me and Daniel there so that I don’t give this cold to my grandma. We were also going to try having Daniel and me go see her today but that idea has been scrapped as well. Mom heads over to the assisted living facility to see her (she tries to go daily and we host dinner here almost every Sunday) and I curl up on my bed to blog while Daniel plays with his Legos.

1545: Cutie pie comes in and asks for “free fry” (french fries). This can be accomplished using a drive-thru so I can stay in my jammies. I tell him to get his socks and shoes on while I limp downstairs with my purse and let my dad know where we’re headed. As we’re leaving, the UPS man comes to the door and hands me two packages: one from Firmoo and one from Shutterfly. I am taken aback because I ordered the glasses from Firmoo on Friday and the cards from Shutterfly on Saturday night!

1550: We’re on our way! We drive to Burger King and get the kiddo some fries. I would usually try to extend the drive a little bit to give his tablet some time to charge but I am in serious pain by this point, so we just get his food and come home.

1640: We get home from our excursion and Daniel heads upstairs to commune with his tablet. I return to my spot on the bed and try to convince Homer (my parents’ grey kitty) to come and be my chest kitty. When he refuses to come when I call him, I go over and fetch him. He protests a little bit but soon begins to purr.

1730: Mom gets home from being with Grandma and we talk about her visit while I give Daniel his evening meds. He takes them again with no problem and receives a couple M&M’s. He goes upstairs to play in his room and I go back to my bed. The pain is worse than usual and the only thing I can think of that would cause it to be this bad is the weather systems moving through the area.

1830: I finally get to hit “publish” on this entry for the first time and I go to rouse Daniel to give him his shower. I find him curled up under his fleece SF Giants blankie. As much as I hate rousing him, he thrives on this routine and he needs a shower. He’s somewhat sleepy so I’m able to get him cleaned up quickly and we get him into his jammies. He heads downstairs for a snack and I follow him to get something for myself. I seem to have whatever respiratory crud Daniel had last week so I now understand his reluctance to eat or drink anything last Wednesday night. However, I have blood sugar issues so I need to eat *SOMETHING*. While he eats whatever is leftover from his lunch, I grab a banana and a Babybel cheese round. That should at least keep my blood sugar up and the protein from the cheese should keep me from getting hungry for a while.

1905: Daniel is back upstairs in his room and I retire to my room to watch TV. “The Big Bang Theory” is on TBS in syndication but I’m not particularly fond of the two episodes on right now so I switch to WGN and watch “Cops”. I also finally get to take some Flexeril now that I’m not going to be having to drive or make any serious parenting decisions in the next 12 hours.

2015: I stop hearing Daniel playing so I go check his room and find him asleep on his bed. He wakes up a little bit when he hears my footsteps and I stroke his head to get him to lie back down. I tuck him in with his blankies, give him a kiss, pray over him, turn out his light and leave his room. He’ll probably come climb up on my bed at some point in the middle of the night but it’s only been recently that we’ve gotten him to go to sleep in his own room for the first time since his hospitalization in March 2011.

2030: I grab my Accounting backpack and decide to take a look at the homework that is due on Tuesday. I’m caught up with Excel for the moment and I don’t want to end up in a situation where I’ve got to burn too much midnight oil to get everything done. Before I start looking at the homework, I email my professor about making an appointment for advising. I’m considering the pursuit of a certificate in Bookkeeping and I want to know what classes I actually have to take, given that I’ve already got a B.A. and part of a Master’s degree. (Is “First Year Experience” really a necessary class? Do I have to take “College Math” if I’ve passed Calculus?)

2230: I’ve lost myself in Accounting work. I decide to get some sleep and switch on the news after packing up my Accounting backpack. I’m falling asleep when Daniel comes in with his blankies and curls up with me…

{five favourites}: Miscellanea (LXXVIII)

#5Faves

One

“Cantus” by Connie Dover. This piece is so beautiful that it’s bringing me to tears, y’all!

Two

This post from Kelly. I don’t care what she says — Kelly is an exceptional mom.

Three

This presidential debate “yoga” game. I definitely think doing this will be better than large quantities of alcohol in the long run.

Four

“Immanuel” by David Wesley. If you like Peter Hollens and you like Christian worship music, you’ll like him.

Five

“Build Your Kingdom Here” by Rend Collective. This is one of the songs I listen to when I need a pick-me-up.

Go love up Bonnie, DeBalino, and the others.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: Choosing Life (I)

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

This is a really controversial subject and I want to make it clear that I’m not judging anyone for the decision they did or didn’t make.

So…

I hate that I’m having to bring this up but… we have a problem in our society and it’s that we shy away from anything that inconveniences us. This manifests itself very prominently when it comes to our inability to accept any physical/mental defect in our children. The abortion rate for diagnosed spina bifida cases is 64%, for example, and I’ve heard people say that the rate of abortions of babies with Down Syndrome is around 90%. That last one doesn’t surprise me because I know they jumped me forward in line for a 3-D ultrasound with Daniel because there was a chance that he had Down Syndrome and they needed to know if they needed to do amniocentesis to get a diagnosis because the test result came back at ~20 weeks gestation and the deadline to terminate the pregnancy was 24 weeks. (For those who haven’t heard the story, my response was that I’d be happy to get the ultrasound but I was not getting amniocentesis nor was I going to abort my kid. It was a big step in my pro-life conversion.) Neither condition is actually “incompatible with life” as many doctors say they are and I think that this is a result of all the lawsuits brought for “birth injuries” because the kid did not come out of the womb in perfect condition.

And yes, the one thing I *WILL* judge are wrongful birth lawsuits. Those things make me vomit because you’re telling your kid that you would have aborted them if you had the chance. (Case in point.) In the case of this mother in Montana, she did not exercise her due diligence and participate in genetic counseling, which is apparently the fault of her doctors, right? (By the way, her daughter is doing fine.) It’s not like there are people who have it and are doing fine or anything…

What I really wish would happen is that doctors working with pregnant women would be required to spend some time interacting with people who *DO* have Down Syndrome or spina bifida because, as I said earlier, neither one is incompatible with life though they can and do make life inconvenient. Two of the daughters of the pastors in the bigger town where we lived in Montana have Down Syndrome and one of them lives on her own, has a job at a daycare, and is able to function on her own with a little bit of help. (The other daughter was quite young when we lived there but I do believe she is moving in the same direction.) I know several young men in their 20’s who are the sons of former colleagues of Jon’s and were born with spina bifida. Both are in college and self-sufficient. I can’t imagine the world without any of these four people.

I’ll probably re-visit this topic tomorrow. In the meantime, I have an Accounting test tomorrow and need to get some sleep!

7 Quick Takes: Migraines, Eye Exams, and Secret Trump Apologists, Oh My!

7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

*facepalm* Let me explain this in small words so that people understand because apparently, there are people on Facebook who are depriving a village somewhere of their chief idiot:

If your reaction to the news that he’s groped women, harassed them, and treated them horribly is anything other than “that’s horrible!” and possibly “I’m not voting for him” (I’m not saying that you have to like or vote for Hillary)… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

If your reaction to this news is “well, I’ve been dealing with that all my life so why is this any different”, you’re missing the freaking point and… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

If your reaction to the news is to deflect to Bill Clinton and what happened during his administrations, you’re missing the point (yet again) and *surprise surprise*… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST. (And for the record, I was not old enough to vote in the 1992 and 1996 elections so you can stop claiming that I’m responsible for whatever he did.)

If your reaction is to cite 50 Shades of Grey as evidence that women are asking for it, you’re a disgusting human being and (not shockingly)… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

If you’re reaction is to say “yeah, it’s horrible but I’m voting for him anyway”, you need a filter between your mouth and brain and *drumroll*… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

— 2 —

And speaking of the stupid deflection to 50 Shades of Grey This meme explains the problem in that logic very succinctly. It also illustrates why I am *INCREDIBLY* proud to have contributed money to the effort to kick Joe Walsh out of office and replace him with the amazingly wonderful Tammy Duckworth. πŸ˜€

Joe Walsh is a moron.

— 3 —

And for the record… You are not required to vote for either Trump or Hillary. If you find them both repugnant and are of the opinion that third parties take votes away from your chosen candidate, you have the option of simply not voting for a presidential choice on the ballot. HOWEVER… you *DO* need to vote for someone for the House, Senate (if there’s a Senate race in your state this year), governor, and for any local races because those people do the day-to-day governing. In the case of your House member and your senator, they’re part of one of the checks and balances on the President’s power.

— 4 —

Eye exams. One of the temple pieces on the frames of my glasses snapped on Tuesday and I had to find someone who could do an eye exam because I haven’t seen either an optometrist or ophthalmologist in probably 2 years. (They get pissy if you go in for glasses and your prescription isn’t current.) One local place was able to get me in this afternoon and when they checked my vision, we discovered that my distance prescription on my sunglasses corrects to better than 20/20 in terms of reading as well. As I’ve had reading glasses for 23 years and bifocals for 22 of them, this was a surprise. It’s also another sign that my vision improved after the HELLP Syndrome which is almost unheard of — usually, women have to get a stronger prescription for their vision after having it.

— 5 —

The timing is impeccable. Can I just tell you how fun it is to have an eye exam while dealing with a migraine? It’s just fabulous. The tech and the optician were both apologizing for putting stuff in my eyes and shining lights in because light sensitivity is one of my migraine symptoms.

— 6 —

Stormy weather. The Pacific Northwest is supposed to get hit with several *MASSIVE* storms this weekend with insane winds and atmospheric pressures that are apparently reminding one forecaster of what was seen during the 1962 Columbus Day storm that killed 46 people. (My Practical Accounting professor had me look it up during class today because I was bored and done checking my homework. It’s nice to be useful.)

I and the rest of God’s country would appreciate it if you’d keep us in prayer that there are no fatalities and no widespread power losses.

— 7 —

A kindred spirit. You know your professor is a kindred spirit when you get all the references to literature, movies, and TV shows that she throws into quizzes/pre-tests/tests. Our last test had the business owners named after characters on The Office and our pre-test for the chapter test this coming Monday had names from Pride and Prejudice.

For more Quick Takes, visit Kelly at This Ain’t The Lyceum.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: Doctors

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

Given that my kiddo had his ADHD appointment and flu shot on Wednesday and I had my flu shot/pneumonia shot yesterday, the subject of doctors is fresh on my mind. I thought I’d share some things I’ve learned in having to find doctor’s and specialists for Daniel. As always, your experience may vary.

[+] Do your homework. Generally, most medical practices have a website and they usually talk a little bit about the doctor’s education, what their passions are with regard to medicine, if they do anything outside of the clinic like medical missions trips, etc. Read up on all of this so you can ask intelligent questions.

[+] Look for doctors who can think out of the box a little bit. Daniel hates doctors. He HATES them and part of it is that he hates being stuck in an exam room or restrained for an exam. Dr. Phenomenal, his pediatrician at UC Davis, used to have them schedule us for her first appointment of the morning when part of the clinic would be empty. We’d go for a walk around the empty part so that Daniel could open/close doors to his hearts content and she and I could have a conversation about whatever was concerning me. We’d pop into empty exam rooms every so often so she could do things like check his ears or listen to his heart, but she was more than happy to let him run. In return, he was slightly better about her messing with him to check his ears.

Dr. Awesome, his pediatrician here in Washington, is similar in that her approach is not to mess with him unless she has to. She lets him play with the automatic paper towel dispenser and turn off the computer screen for her which probably makes him like her because he *NEVER* gets to do stuff like that when it’s just me in the room!

[+] Find a balance between respecting their education but also not letting them speak down to you. Remember that your technical degree or bachelor’s degree in the humanities is not equivalent to their medical degree. This means that while you can ask questions about that blog post you read on the Wheatbelly blog that talks about how all gluten is bad for us, they’re going to tell you that only around 1% of the population actually *HAS* celiac disease and the Wheatbelly people are quacks and you should *LISTEN* to them. (Dr. William Davis is a cardiologist, not a gastroenterologist. There’s a difference.)

By the same token, don’t settle for doctors being condescending to you. You know your kid and they need to treat you with respect, even if you come across as a hysterical mom. One of Daniel’s pediatric neurologists had a resident working under her who treated me like I could only understand one-syllable words. Later, I mentioned to the neurologist and her entourage that Daniel was starting an ABA preschool program and Dr. Condescending asked me what ABA was. The rest of the entourage was similarly clueless so the neurologist asked me to explain it to them. It was fun watching their faces when I told them that “ABA is a methodology of working with kids with autism in which you achieve the desired behavior by modifying the antecedent.” They looked at me as if to say, “oh crap… she has a brain!”

This is all for now. Leave me any questions you have.

7 Quick Takes: Flu Shots, the VP Debate, and Other Fun Topics

7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

The hazards of sleeping in. Daniel’s quarterly ADHD appointment was yesterday and I somehow set my clock forward an hour while trying to turn off my alarm so I was an hour early getting dressed, getting my lattΓ©, and arriving at school to pick up the kid. Of course, I discovered this when I looked at my watch while signing him out… and had to tell the secretary (who was on the phone with his teacher) that I was an hour early and would be coming back an hour later to get him. (I ended up going home and doing accounting homework.) When I came back to get him, his incredibly awesome teacher managed not to laugh when she brought him out and I explained what had happened. I’m also very thankful that she came out personally to bring him to the office because other schools would just send an aide. (Then again, his classroom is right across from the office so it was a matter of just popping out of his classroom.)

— 2 —

Blown away. We managed to get what I thought was the first appointment after lunch because the waiting room and office were pretty empty. (I later learned that his pediatrician takes a late lunch.) Kiddo was in a relatively good mood because it was a school day (he would go to school seven days a week if we let him) and was unusually chill when Dr. Awesome and her medical student came in and talked to us. (As it was an autism appointment, she just needed to make sure the meds were working and continuing to be a blessing for Daniel instead of a curse.) He was totally happy with her until she wanted to take a listen to his lungs. He was not amenable to this but having her listen to his lungs was not negotiable, so kiddo ended up on my lap with me holding him and telling him over and over that she was not hurting him. Other than that, she was fine with just watching him play tablet, talking to me, and surreptitiously observing him.

The nurse had asked when we came in if I wanted my kiddo to have a flu shot and I said “yes” because having to come back again for it was not going to make me happy. Once Dr. Awesome and her student were out the door, two nurses came in and while one of them prepped, the other one explained the game plan to me: put the kid on the table and have me hold down his upper body while one nurse held down his legs and the other one gave him the shot. I’m not even sure that more than five seconds elapsed between me setting him on the table and them being done with the shot — they were that fast! (Then again, they do this all the time so they have a good system.) In any case, I was incredibly impressed and told them this.

— 3 —

Baseball!!! DIDJA HEAR ABOUT MY BOYS ANNIHILATING THE METS IN THE NL WILD CARD GAME?!?!!?!? DIDJA?!?!?!? DIDJA?!?!?! The trash-talking has already started in anticipation of their play-off games with the Cubs starting Friday.

— 4 —

My pretty notebook. Jenny of Unremarkable Files asked for pictures of my notebook. I aim to please so here you go, Jenny! I apologize that my lines aren’t straight — I’m drawing all those things freehand and I’m incapable of drawing a perfectly straight line.

My pretty notebook
My pretty notebook
My pretty notebook
My pretty notebook

— 5 —

Prerequisite take on the VP Debate. I didn’t watch the debate for obvious reasons (as in, I already know who I’m voting for) but I find it amusing that two of my friends who are on opposite sides of the political spectrum and who don’t know each other came up with the same suggestion: each candidate has a shock collar and gets shocked every time they interrupt the other candidate or the moderator. Shocks also happen if they go over their allotted speaking time. THAT would be entertaining!

Another friend (completely unrelated to the other two) suggested that the moderator should get a taser. I’m thinking I like this one better?

— 6 —

Worth a read. My priest shared this piece on the art of condolence by Bruce Feiler on Facebook this week. I thought it was pretty awesome and a good read for people of every age group.

— 7 —

You mean my college education is actually a good thing? I saw this story on the news a few days ago and it reiterates why a college degree or at least *SOME* form of post-secondary credential is essential. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a bachelor’s degree but at least some kind of specialized study is needed. So, if you’re going to claim that “not every kid needs to go to college”, think again. πŸ˜€

As for my “useless” degree in Religious Studies, it taught me how to learn, how to find research (a skill which I have heard my professors here say is sorely lacking across the board in students from homeschoolers to public schoolers these days), and proves to employers that I can stick something out long-term. If I was still at the import brokerage in Montana, I’d be eligible for management training simply *BECAUSE* I have a bachelor’s degree.

For more Quick Takes, visit Kelly at This Ain’t The Lyceum.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: My Story

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

It’s interesting that this covers the month of October because I found out I was pregnant with the kidlet on October 11, 2008. It was simultaneously a joyful and terrifying thing. πŸ™‚ I was due around Father’s Day 2009 and it seemed like it was going to be a semi-normal pregnancy… until my hands started swelling in March 2009 and strange symptoms started happening. I had no idea that I was going to have to have an emergency c-section at 29.5 weeks gestation because of Class II HELLP Syndrome and that Daniel’s birth weight was going to make my 3 lb 12 oz. one seem gigantic. (Kiddo weighed 1 lb 15 oz. and was 14 1/4 inches long.) I think it’s probably good that God didn’t let me in on that little fact when Jon and I decided to try for a baby because I can *TOTALLY* see myself pulling a Jonah and figuratively fleeing to Tarshish!

Daniel was pretty tiny and he did have a lot of growing to do… but he is definitely *MY* child because he ignored the memo on all of this and decided that 3-4 months in the hospital was a little too long to hang out there. He came home on his 2 month birthday and did not require oxygen. He did have an inguinal hernia that we eventually had repaired (once he was old enough for anethesia) and ROP but that corrected itself as well.

While he was as fierce as I am about overcoming things, he did unfortunately have a 50% developmental delay and we started him in physical therapy at 13 months old, occupational therapy at 17 months old, and speech therapy a little after he turned 2 years old. He didn’t sit up until he was a little over a year and a half old and didn’t take his first independent steps until he was 2 1/2. He is only now really using a pencil well with special grips and is finally developing speech and sentence structure. The good thing is that when something developmental comes for him, it takes off like wildfire so I’m thinking he’ll probably be talking somewhat well by his next birthday?

His immune system was also compromised because of prematurity and that unfortunately meant that he could not fight off basic infections, especially respiratory ones. The scariest one was probably the one that landed him on a ventilator for a week and a half in the PICU at UC Davis Medical Center followed by a bit more than a week on the pediatric unit. We’ve also seen quite a bit of time in various pediatric ER bays at UCD and had a couple more smaller hospitalizations, the most recent one being a week-long one three years ago.

He was diagnosed with autism at age 2 1/2 and started school in an ABA preschool class at age 3. We added in-home ABA therapies a year later. Four years later, he is still in an autism-specific class but we’re OK with that and he seems to be thriving with it. Let’s just say that I have become almost an expert on IEP’s. πŸ™‚

A year ago, his pediatric neurologist diagnosed him with ADHD and put him on Adderall. While this is not a popular decision in some of the circles in which I travel (because, you know, ADHD *TOTALLY* isn’t a thing… except when you have a kid with no off switch), it’s been a lifesaver for us and for Daniel. He can sit down to play and focus on what he is doing, freeing me up to take care of my own school, do housework, take a shower, eat a meal sitting down… We’ve seen a child psychiatrist who met with us monthly and his pediatrician up here in Washington sees us regularly as well as his Adderall requires a special prescription and in-depth supervision.

So what would you like me to write about this month? Leave me a comment to let me know and I’ll see what I can do. πŸ™‚