To whom this may concern:

I’m chill with you rejecting what offerings I submit to you and I’m chill with you accepting them. All I ask is… couldja please choose one and stick with it instead of oscillating between deciding to maybe reject the nutrition or accept it? I’m getting kind of tired of dry heaving and having that feeling like I’m facing rejection… except that you don’t want to reject everything just yet.

Thanks.

The One Who Is Slave To Your Whims At The Moment

I think I’ve had this bug since Thursday. I had taken Seroquel the night before so I was really dopey and I remember waking up that night with wicked stomach pain. I had a few black-outs while trying to find something to eat and finally forced some Instant Breakfast down. (Seroquel can mess with your blood sugar.) I had stomach pain all day and then woke up at 3:45 on Friday morning with severe stomach pain. I rarely get pain that bad and I was praying that it wasn’t Crohn’s or appendicitis. I ended up making myself some oatmeal and ginger ale which apparently satisfied my stomach enough to let me go back to sleep. I had some instant breakfast when I woke up and 2 hours later started vomiting. That pretty much set the tone for the rest of the day.

I slept fitfully last night but… my fever is down and I haven’t thrown up in 12 hours. I got so sick of dry heaving yesterday (I’d literally purged EVERYTHING in my stomach) that I ate some cottage cheese, thinking that it would at least give me something to be throwing up. The cottage cheese amazingly stayed down and I slept without having to get up at 5 and nosh on crackers. I haven’t thrown up in over 12 hours but I’m still feeling icky. Church is debatable tomorrow — I’m leaning toward not going because I’m not sure how I’m going to feel and I really don’t want to go out in 40F weather if I’m sick. (To clarify why this is a big deal, I NEVER miss church unless I’m incredibly sick or unable to attend due to travel.)

Hoping this is over by the 19th (the anniversary of my nativity)…