Category Archives: Personal Issues

To the Man In $tarbux

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To the man in $tarbux who is going around talking to people at a decibel level reserved for jet planes,

I don’t like you. I don’t want to hear you. I have an incredible amount of homework and classwork due on Thursday and Friday and am working here so I can sprawl across two tables. I have my ear buds in because I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE!!!!

Coming over and talking to me will cause me to glare at you and tell you to SHUT YOUR GD PIEHOLE AND EFF OFF!!!! Continuing to try and talk to me will piss me off more and the only reason you are still in one piece is that the barista came over to talk to you and saved me the trouble.

Let me reiterate:

I DON’T LIKE YOU.

THE MERE SOUND OF YOUR VOICE PISSES ME OFF.

I DON’T WANT TO SOCIALIZE WITH YOU.

So please, LEAVE MY COFFEE SHOP AND GO SOMEWHERE ELSE WHERE YOUR MERE EXISTENCE IS NOT GOING TO PUT ME IN A HOMICIDAL RAGE!!!!!!!!!!!

Snuggles,

The Tiny Irish-American Woman with the Earbuds and the Accounting Books

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: October 9, 2016

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For Today… October 9, 2016

Simple Woman's Daybook

Looking out my window… sunny though chilly (at least to me). The Grumpy Cat Weather app on my phone says it’s in the low 60’s.

I am thinking… about people who are dismissing Trump’s statements as “locker room talk” or “jock talk”. Especially odious are the people *WHO HAVE DAUGHTERS* and are doing this. His alleged apology showed no remorse — “I’m sorry if you were offended” is narcissistic crap as is his explaining away what he did and alluding to Bill Clinton. True men don’t deflect their behavior onto others when they apologize.

I am thankful… for those I follow on Twitter who are live-tweeting the debate tonight so I don’t have to waste 90 minutes of my life watching it. (Lest I be accused of creating my own little bubble of like-minded people on Twitter, most of the people I follow are people with whom I disagree on politics.) I’d love for the mainstream media to stop moderating these debates and give them back to the League of Women Voters. There might actually be some civility if each politician isn’t trying to vie for the ability to get their soundbite into the debate.

One of my favorite things… having all of my Excel work done 24 hours ahead of when it is due.

I am wearing… blue-green shirt and black capris. Church attire this morning was my burgundy shirt from Old Navy with a black cardigan and black slacks from Kohl’s. My shoes were my amazingly awesome black flats from Naturalizer that are two years old and still going strong.

I am creating… a separate page with the comment policy for this blog. It *WAS* listed on the page with the ground rules for this site but I have some readers who apparently are illiterate and *SHOCKED* when I dare to enforce it. Having it on a separate page might solve this issue. 🙂

I am reading… not enough. I need to make a better effort to commune with my e-reader more often!

I am hoping… for a relatively quiet week.

I am learning… about journalizing and posting in my Accounting class.

In my kitchen… I think Mom is making “Jimmy Chicken” tonight. It’s a family recipe.

In the school room… Daniel continues to enjoy school and even tried some of the applesauce his class made for a fall-themed activity.

Post Script… I’m hoping the research they’re doing pans out.

Shared Quote… Yay adulting!

Let them eat cake!

A moment from my day… We were blessing animals today so we sang this for our processional:

Hosted by The Simple Woman.

7 Quick Takes: Flu Shots, the VP Debate, and Other Fun Topics

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7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

The hazards of sleeping in. Daniel’s quarterly ADHD appointment was yesterday and I somehow set my clock forward an hour while trying to turn off my alarm so I was an hour early getting dressed, getting my latté, and arriving at school to pick up the kid. Of course, I discovered this when I looked at my watch while signing him out… and had to tell the secretary (who was on the phone with his teacher) that I was an hour early and would be coming back an hour later to get him. (I ended up going home and doing accounting homework.) When I came back to get him, his incredibly awesome teacher managed not to laugh when she brought him out and I explained what had happened. I’m also very thankful that she came out personally to bring him to the office because other schools would just send an aide. (Then again, his classroom is right across from the office so it was a matter of just popping out of his classroom.)

— 2 —

Blown away. We managed to get what I thought was the first appointment after lunch because the waiting room and office were pretty empty. (I later learned that his pediatrician takes a late lunch.) Kiddo was in a relatively good mood because it was a school day (he would go to school seven days a week if we let him) and was unusually chill when Dr. Awesome and her medical student came in and talked to us. (As it was an autism appointment, she just needed to make sure the meds were working and continuing to be a blessing for Daniel instead of a curse.) He was totally happy with her until she wanted to take a listen to his lungs. He was not amenable to this but having her listen to his lungs was not negotiable, so kiddo ended up on my lap with me holding him and telling him over and over that she was not hurting him. Other than that, she was fine with just watching him play tablet, talking to me, and surreptitiously observing him.

The nurse had asked when we came in if I wanted my kiddo to have a flu shot and I said “yes” because having to come back again for it was not going to make me happy. Once Dr. Awesome and her student were out the door, two nurses came in and while one of them prepped, the other one explained the game plan to me: put the kid on the table and have me hold down his upper body while one nurse held down his legs and the other one gave him the shot. I’m not even sure that more than five seconds elapsed between me setting him on the table and them being done with the shot — they were that fast! (Then again, they do this all the time so they have a good system.) In any case, I was incredibly impressed and told them this.

— 3 —

Baseball!!! DIDJA HEAR ABOUT MY BOYS ANNIHILATING THE METS IN THE NL WILD CARD GAME?!?!!?!? DIDJA?!?!?!? DIDJA?!?!?! The trash-talking has already started in anticipation of their play-off games with the Cubs starting Friday.

— 4 —

My pretty notebook. Jenny of Unremarkable Files asked for pictures of my notebook. I aim to please so here you go, Jenny! I apologize that my lines aren’t straight — I’m drawing all those things freehand and I’m incapable of drawing a perfectly straight line.

My pretty notebook
My pretty notebook
My pretty notebook
My pretty notebook

— 5 —

Prerequisite take on the VP Debate. I didn’t watch the debate for obvious reasons (as in, I already know who I’m voting for) but I find it amusing that two of my friends who are on opposite sides of the political spectrum and who don’t know each other came up with the same suggestion: each candidate has a shock collar and gets shocked every time they interrupt the other candidate or the moderator. Shocks also happen if they go over their allotted speaking time. THAT would be entertaining!

Another friend (completely unrelated to the other two) suggested that the moderator should get a taser. I’m thinking I like this one better?

— 6 —

Worth a read. My priest shared this piece on the art of condolence by Bruce Feiler on Facebook this week. I thought it was pretty awesome and a good read for people of every age group.

— 7 —

You mean my college education is actually a good thing? I saw this story on the news a few days ago and it reiterates why a college degree or at least *SOME* form of post-secondary credential is essential. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a bachelor’s degree but at least some kind of specialized study is needed. So, if you’re going to claim that “not every kid needs to go to college”, think again. 😀

As for my “useless” degree in Religious Studies, it taught me how to learn, how to find research (a skill which I have heard my professors here say is sorely lacking across the board in students from homeschoolers to public schoolers these days), and proves to employers that I can stick something out long-term. If I was still at the import brokerage in Montana, I’d be eligible for management training simply *BECAUSE* I have a bachelor’s degree.

For more Quick Takes, visit Kelly at This Ain’t The Lyceum.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: IEP’s and 504 Plans

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

I’ve heard some of my homeschooling friends on Twitter talk about how they’re homeschooling their kids so that they’re not forced to have an IEP or 504 plan. I really wish I could tell them that neither one is a bad thing and that they ensure that their kids will have access to what they need in order to succeed in school.

So what are they, Jen?

An IEP is a written-out plan that spells out the special educational environment in which a student learns. (“IEP” stands for “individualized education plan”.) Putting it simply, it describes what needs to be in place instruction-wise in order for him to succeed. His covers not only educational goals but also goals for physical, occupational, and speech therapies. Every three years, they do what is referred to as a “triennial IEP” where they do very thorough testing (which is paid for by the school and/or district) to make sure that the student still needs an IEP and also to see where the student is in terms of their therapies and their psycho-social-behavioral development. To qualify, a student needs a diagnosis of one or more of 13 different disabilities and need a very specific environment in order to make progress in their education because of that disability. It came out of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) which states that individuals with disabilities are guaranteed a free and appropriate public education in the least restrictive environment possible.

A 504 plan deals with ensuring that students get accomodations needed to make progress in their education. It covers things like audiobooks, notetakers, and extended time for tests. It basically exists to level the playing field for general education. A child qualifies if they have a disability and that disability makes it harder to learn in a general education classroom. The qualifications are a little more broad than they are for a child to qualify for an IEP. It comes from Section 504 of the Rehibilitation Act of 1973.

Which one does Daniel have?

Daniel has an IEP and has had one in place since March 2012. In order to put one together or make changes, an IEP meeting or IEP amendment meeting has to be called and the IEP team has to gather. The team is comprised of me, his special education teacher, a general education teacher for the same grade level, his various therapists, a special education person for the district, and a school psychologist. If a meeting is called and someone cannot attend for whatever reason, I have to sign paperwork excusing them from the meeting. Otherwise, everyone has to be present.

What happens at an IEP meeting?

At the beginning of every meeting, I get handed a thick packet which contains all of my rights and the procedural safeguards. They are required by law to offer it to me, even if I choose to refuse it. (I usually do unless it’s the first time I’ve met with the team at that particular school and/or that particular school district.) Everyone has to sign a paper saying that they were present and I have to sign something saying that the procedural safeguard paperwork was offered to me and that I chose to refuse it, because an IEP is a legal document and could be admissible in court if I sued the school or district for violating Daniel’s rights under the IDEA Act. We go over the various goals spelled out in the previous IEP, talk about any meeting of goals and/or progress made, and what new goals they are setting or new services they want to add. At the end, I have paperwork to sign, stating that I agree with everything outlined in the plan. If I don’t agree with something, I have right to refuse to sign it and they need to fix the issue to my satisfaction.

Honestly, it’s ~2 hours once a year for the yearly IEP review and maybe 20-45 minutes for an amendment meeting which is maybe once or twice a year (if even that often).

If you want a lovely table that illustrates the similarities and differences between the two, click here.

{five favourites}: Miscellanea (LXXVII)

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#5Faves

One

This list of 8 things to stop doing for your kids. Everything on this list is something I was expected to do on my own when I was a teenager and even before as a middle schooler. Seriously y’all, it’s all doable and I’m even working with Daniel (and have been since age 5) on things like putting laundry away and picking stuff up so that by the time he’s 18, he’s able to do a lot of stuff on his own even if he’s not headed to college or living independently.

And on the subject of #3 on the list, don’t fill out your kids’ college applications or financial aid paperwork. If they belong in college, they can fill out their own applications, write their own admissions essays, keep track of their own deadlines, learn to read loan documents, and fill out the FAFSA themselves. I know that I had to do all of that when I was applying to schools at this time of year back in the late 90’s. (My parents did give me tax information for the FAFSA and financial aid paperwork but I had to fill out the forms myself.) I mean, we had to fill out college applications my sophomore and junior years for the college and career unit we had!

Two

This video from Kristina Kuzmic. Seriously, YOUR KIDS ARE ALLOWED TO BE MAD AT YOU. If your kid is your best friend, you’ve got a problem.

Three

Office supply stores. Staples is my idea of heaven. I love all the notebooks and pens and the potential that they have and the ideas for what to do with them and and and… Even the college bookstore’s notebook and school supply aisles make me happy.

Four

Sleep. My kiddo actually *SLEPT* last night. I am joyful. Really. I am. I’m just not awake enough to express it yet.

Five

Rain. We got some rain last night. It was glorious to listen to while working on things.

Go love up Bonnie, DeBalino, and the others.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: ADHD

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

ADHD isn’t necessarily a condition that qualifies a kid as having “special needs” but it’s part of Daniel’s mix so I am including it here.

So… Daniel was diagnosed with ADHD a year ago. I used to say that ADHD was overly diagnosed and that parents needed to control their kids better… and then I gave birth to a kid with no off switch. Oops.

Anyway…

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a brain disorder marked by an ongoing pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity that interferes with functioning or development. (Source: NIMH page on ADHD)

What this actually means: In Daniel’s case, it’s more on the hyperactivity/inattention side of things though he can be impulsive as well. Mostly, he just doesn’t have an off switch so it used to be really hard to get him to calm down to sleep at night. He has gotten better with age but he still has a hard time focusing on tasks at hand.

How we treat it: We medicate him, which can be a controversial decision because I encounter people who make snippy comments about whether I made the decision for Daniel’s sake or for mine. What I’d love to tell them is that if they are so sure that my decision is wrong, they can come and take over my life and take over bedtime with him. They can also try to get things done while there’s a kid bouncing off the walls. On medication, he can focus on things for a longer period of time, which helps with school but also helps at home where I can get stuff done when I’m not having to deal with a kid berzerking around the house. (Then again, it helps to not be having to restrict him to one room like we did when we were living with my former in-laws. Kiddo hates being restrained or restricted and he had serious cabin fever.) He also sleeps better and is happier overall on medication.

Daniel takes an extended-release form of Adderall in the morning and a low dose of Clonidine and a Melatonin pill at night. He used to not be able to swallow pills well and after trying and failing to be able to give him the powder in the Adderall XR capsule or the pulverized powder of a Clonidine tablet, we started giving him his meds with a spoonful of peanut butter. He still hated taking the pills for a long time so we (read: my mom and I and sometimes my dad) used to have to restrain him and give them to him with some M&M’s. He finally stopped fighting us this spring though he still expects the M&M’s which I am currently phasing out.

How you can help out friends with kids in the same situation: Understand that the decision they make might not be the one you would make and they probably don’t need to hear about how ADHD is a creation of the pharmaceutical industry. (Can you tell how many stupid comments I get from what I’ve said over the last few days? Seriously, some people have no filters on their mouths.)

Otherwise, ask if there’s something you can come and help with like doing dishes or folding laundry because your friend might be in the situation where their kid is trying to find things to do (like pry up the flooring) while the parent is otherwise occupied because they’re bored.

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: October 2, 2016

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For Today… October 2, 2016

Simple Woman's Daybook

Looking out my window… dark. It was allegedly 70F but felt colder. It’s down in the 40’s right now.

I am thinking… about what to write tonight for the Write 31 Days challenge.

I am thankful… that my boys (the Giants) clinched a play-off spot. (Yeah yeah yeah… the Dodgers clinched the NL West but I don’t give a crap about that.)

One of my favorite things… Tillamook ice cream.

I am wearing… jammies. Church clothes were my indigo shirt, black slacks, my black cardigan, and black flats. I traded the flats and slacks for jeans and a hoodie after church.

I am creating… Excel files to submit to my Excel teacher.

I am watching… The Big Bang Theory re-runs.

I am hoping… my boys win the NL Wild Card game!

I am learning… how to do T accounts and various kinds of financial statements. I have a test on Tuesday!

In my kitchen… Mom made stroganoff and apple pie tonight.

In the school room… Daniel continues to do well and his teacher is smitten with him.

Post Script… Here are some American foods that foreigners find absolutely disgusting. I knew about some of these from the various exchange students that I interacted with in two of Jon’s parishes.

Shared Quote… From Nadia Bolz-Weber several years ago:

Reporter from the Grand Forks Herald: “what would you say to the folks who think that tattooing the body is a desecration of God’s temple”

Me: “that they should for sure not get any”

A moment from my day… I was telling someone about Tim Hawkins’ “hand-raising church” schtick today.

Hosted by The Simple Woman.