Attention mother of screaming and shrieking brat who is kicking the counter and his mother:

TAKE YOUR LITTLE MONSTER OUT AND DISCIPLINE HIM. I DON’T CARE IF YOU SPANK HIM, SPEAK TO HIM FIRMLY, OR DUCT TAPE HIM TO THE BUMPER OF THE NEAREST SEMI. JUST FOR THE LOVE OF [insert deity], REMOVE HIM SO THAT THE REST OF US AREN’T SUBJECTED TO HIS FOUL AND EAR-PIERCING BEHAVIOR!!!!!!! BE A PARENT — YOU CAN COME BACK AND GET YOUR LATTE LATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Snuggles,
jen