(It’s a Yogi Berra quote.)

I’ve been thinking back to June 2003 which was my baptism-by-fire into ministering to grieving people. Yesterday morning, I went and sat with a family who had lost their youngest son in a (very preventable) car accident and then stood with them at the funeral home as they went to view their son’s body. (Thankfully, the two funeral directors here had cleaned him up pretty well before letting the family see him.) Two years ago, I wouldn’t have been able to do either one. (I still did NOT want to be at the funeral home yesterday, but I was there because these are people I love and part of love is stepping outside one’s comfort zone.)

One thing that the bishop was emphasizing with me on Thursday was his belief in the priesthood of all believers. Jon had capitalized it on his mobility papers and it was an interesting point for me to ponder. My ministry may not be an ordained one, but I still do have one and I’m seeing more and more that I need to develop some of my gifts more because everything I have done as a pastor’s wife has prepared me for my next task.

I’ll be giving a prayer shawl to C (the mother of the deceased) today after I prep for Communion this afternoon. I’m hoping it’s a good thing for her…

My angst is on hold at the moment because I need to be a mature adult. The adult son of some parishioners (who are among Jon’s biggest supporters and who are just wonderful people) was killed in a car accident last night. I went with Jon to be with the family this morning and was the hugger and hand-holder.

Being with people in crisis is actually really meaningful to me, so I think I’m going to train to be a hospice volunteer wherever Jon ends up next. It’s not ordained ministry, but it’s a necessary one.

Lord, thank you for reminding me that this is not all about me — it’s about You. However, could You please just smack me with a 2×4 next time instead of taking someone else’s life?

Oh yes… I love all of you very much and please WEAR YOUR SEATBELTS. This death could have been avoided if he had buckled up.

Rick has a really good audio post on his musings this morning while driving to church. Go listen to it!

What I liked about it is that he admits that he did not want to get up and go to church because he woke up feeling icky. He goes in to talk about how he wants to go to church more than he wants to be lazy. I so agree when he says…

I would rather be with God’s people on God’s day and give God more than my whining.

I’ve had a really rough couple months and I went to the BIG LUTHERAN CHURCH IN TOWN this morning because it was getting to the point where I was having to take massive doses of anxiety meds to deal with worship on Sunday due to my hurt and anger. I had taken some Seroquel last night to calm my nerves and it meant that I was really sleepy this morning but I got up anyway, showered, tossed down cereal and milk, got dressed, and trudged through the snow flurries (!!!!!!!) to church this morning. I really pushed myself to get up and do church and it was worth it. The sermon spoke to me (mostly because it was preached differently than Jon preaches) and the music was wonderful. I got to sing harmony on Love Divine All Love’s Excelling and it was set to correct tune, which made me even happier.

I think it’s good that I’m taking May off from Jon’s churches — I need some perspective right now and I feel like I’m getting it.