Lately, I’ve been getting a lot of comments that are starting to make me a bit irritated. At church, we have several new babies and if I hold one (especially since I’m one of the few that can get him to sleep through church), the older women smile and say “that looks so natural” with the inference being that I should start having some of my own now that I’m married. I’ll also get people asking “so are you and Jon trying right now?” Then there are some of Jon’s family members who have remarked that we’ve been married longer than 9 months (it will be 2 years next week) and “where are the kids?” My response: “we’re waiting.”
Don’t get me wrong — I love kids and I do want them someday — just NOT NOW. Our lives are still not settled enough, I could be going back to school this fall or next, and we also don’t know that what I have isn’t Crohn’s disease (they’re not sure anymore) and if it is Crohn’s, having kids could endanger my life because it would cause a flare-up. It is just not a good time to consider having children and hearing from people that “I should let the Lord control my childbearing and fertility” is not exactly helping.
Is something wrong with me that I actually want to wait until things are more stable?