Monthly Archives: October 2016

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: Choosing Life (I)

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

This is a really controversial subject and I want to make it clear that I’m not judging anyone for the decision they did or didn’t make.

So…

I hate that I’m having to bring this up but… we have a problem in our society and it’s that we shy away from anything that inconveniences us. This manifests itself very prominently when it comes to our inability to accept any physical/mental defect in our children. The abortion rate for diagnosed spina bifida cases is 64%, for example, and I’ve heard people say that the rate of abortions of babies with Down Syndrome is around 90%. That last one doesn’t surprise me because I know they jumped me forward in line for a 3-D ultrasound with Daniel because there was a chance that he had Down Syndrome and they needed to know if they needed to do amniocentesis to get a diagnosis because the test result came back at ~20 weeks gestation and the deadline to terminate the pregnancy was 24 weeks. (For those who haven’t heard the story, my response was that I’d be happy to get the ultrasound but I was not getting amniocentesis nor was I going to abort my kid. It was a big step in my pro-life conversion.) Neither condition is actually “incompatible with life” as many doctors say they are and I think that this is a result of all the lawsuits brought for “birth injuries” because the kid did not come out of the womb in perfect condition.

And yes, the one thing I *WILL* judge are wrongful birth lawsuits. Those things make me vomit because you’re telling your kid that you would have aborted them if you had the chance. (Case in point.) In the case of this mother in Montana, she did not exercise her due diligence and participate in genetic counseling, which is apparently the fault of her doctors, right? (By the way, her daughter is doing fine.) It’s not like there are people who have it and are doing fine or anything…

What I really wish would happen is that doctors working with pregnant women would be required to spend some time interacting with people who *DO* have Down Syndrome or spina bifida because, as I said earlier, neither one is incompatible with life though they can and do make life inconvenient. Two of the daughters of the pastors in the bigger town where we lived in Montana have Down Syndrome and one of them lives on her own, has a job at a daycare, and is able to function on her own with a little bit of help. (The other daughter was quite young when we lived there but I do believe she is moving in the same direction.) I know several young men in their 20’s who are the sons of former colleagues of Jon’s and were born with spina bifida. Both are in college and self-sufficient. I can’t imagine the world without any of these four people.

I’ll probably re-visit this topic tomorrow. In the meantime, I have an Accounting test tomorrow and need to get some sleep!

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: October 16, 2016

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For Today…

Simple Woman's Daybook

Looking out my window… cloudy and windy with temps in the low 50’s. We missed getting hit with the worst of the big storm last night but we’ve still got some of the winds from it blowing.

I am thinking… about my Practical Accounting test tomorrow and the Excel work to get done before Wednesday.

I am thankful… we didn’t lose power last night or have any of the big trees in the yard fall on the house like it was predicted to happen.

One of my favorite things… calm nights where I can listen to music and chill.

I am wearing… chocolate brown shirt from Fred Meyer and jeans from Kohl’s. Church clothes were my burgundy Old Navy shirt and my black slacks/black cardigan from Kohl’s with my trusty black flats.

I am creating… a folder for the student files for this chapter of Excel. (We have database files that we play with as we work through the chapter.)

I am listening to… the wind outside.

I am hoping… my glasses arrive from Firmoo soon and that they do in fact fit and look good on me.

I am learning… about maintaining workbooks in Excel and adjustments in Practical Accounting.

In my kitchen… I think chicken cacciatore is on the menu tonight.

In the school room… Daniel has school pictures on Wednesday so I need to schedule in a haircut for him in the next two days.

Post Script… I was greatly amused by this during the last debate.

Shared Quote… I thought this was awesome.

My new motto.

A moment from my day… I had the song “I’ll Tell Me Ma” in my head last night and found a cool version by Dr. Eric Jones that involves body percussion. The original song is on top and the Eric Jones version is on the bottom.

Hosted by The Simple Woman.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: Blogger Spotlight on Rebecca of “Backwards in High Heels”

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

I’m in the midst of trying to get work for Chapter 6 in my Excel book done early (it’s due on Wednesday by 11:55 p.m. but I try to get stuff done at least 24 hours before the due date in that class in case there’s a problem and I have to do a lot of work at school), doing a couple extra problems for my Accounting class in prep for the test on Monday, and doing a boatload of laundry in case we lose power tonight when the really scary storm hits. (I only own three pairs of jeans and they’re all being washed. I need to hit up Fred Meyer or Kohl’s for more so I can give them to my mom to hem.) Because I have a deadline on how long I can probably work tonight, you’re getting another blogger spotlight.

Why I’m spotlighting this blogger: When I approached Rebecca and told her that I wanted to feature her and her blog for this, I wanted to be really careful because while her daughter Ella is in a wheelchair after losing the use of her legs at age 9, she’s not exactly what people would consider “special needs” (she prefers “adaptive”)…

(By the way, they finally have a somewhat firm diagnosis for her!!! Details are here and here.)

She’s currently the number two ranked professional female wheelchair skater (WCMX) in the world, I’ve seen videos of her doing rung pull-ups at her mom’s CrossFit gym (something that I lack the arm strength to even think about doing), and she’s perfectly capable of speaking up for herself on MANY subjects. In other words, she’s kicking butt and taking names so she’d tell you not to pity her. 🙂

What I want to feature, I guess, is what her mom Rebecca did to get Ella the wheelchair she needed. After getting denied multiple times by insurance companies (because insurance companies are that way), Rebecca took to Twitter with the hashtag #ellaneedswheels. Chevrolet mistakenly retweeted it… and that was a fabulous thing because the hashtag went viral which got the attention of the escalation department of her insurance company. Long story short, the insurance company caved after 3 Fox News Anchors and Michelle Malkin retweeted the story. 🙂 (An article by my friend Sarah about the whole thing is here.)

Oh yeah… there was also the online swear jar thing. 🙂

So please, go check out Rebecca’s blog while I fold laundry before the world outside fills with flying houses, witches on brooms, and flying monkeys.

My cup of cranberry juice.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: Snarky Answers to Stupid Remarks

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

Every parent of a special kiddo has had at least one person make a stupid remark to them. Some people have even let me do guest posts on this subject. 🙂 Now that I’m kinda sorta done with hell week (at least until I start correcting the issue with one of the problems on my Accounting homework), I thought I’d post a few here.

“Daniel is autistic? Did you vaccinate him? Have you tried the GAPS diet?”

*utters a gutteral growl and points to the shirt that reads “Yes, my kid is autistic. Yes, we vaccinated him. No, we’re not doing the GAPS diet. Now go away, you weapons-grade plum!!”*

The word “retarded”.

Apparently someone’s parents neglected to teach them manners! Good thing to know I’m raising Daniel not to be socially stunted enough to say something like that in public. 🙂 *smiles sweetly*

“Need help? (Usually said as I was trying to enter or exit with the kid in his stroller.)

Nope! What makes you think that?

“You need to take care of yourself. (Usually said after criticizing Daniel’s behavior or my parenting.)

You’re right! Thanks for offering to pay for a qualified sitter while you drive me to the local nail place for a mani/pedi and clean my house from top to bottom! Oh yeah… you can also pick me up an iced vanilla latté with whole milk from Whidbey Coffee Company on the way. 🙂 Don’t forget to scrub my toilets and fold my laundry before you pick me up! *smiles saccharinely*

It must have been so hard to leave your kid in the hospital and come home every night. (This was said to me at a church dinner after Daniel’s epic three-week hospital stay in March 2011.)

*glares* Who said I came home every night? Didn’t Jon tell you how much I *LOVE* hospital food, showering only once every 4 days, and sleeping in uncomfortable chairs while watching my kid hooked up to endless tubes and machines?

Someone calls Daniel the “Planned Parenthood poster child”

*repetitively throat-punches the speaker because there are some things YOU JUST DON’T SAY TO A MOTHER!!!!!!!!* (Making this even worse, it was a close family member who said it. Needless to say, we have no relationship anymore and I’m not regretting it.)

Something about how having an autistic child is the worst thing they could imagine.

Yeah, you know, having a child who makes comments like that to people must be pretty humiliating as well. I weep for your mom.

“I’m sorry your child is retarded.”

*shrugs* Eh, at least he’s smarter than you are!

It must be hard knowing that your kid is autistic because you chose to give him the MMR vaccine.

I dunno… I think it would be harder being so deluded that you believe that lie that vaccines cause autism even after *MULTIPLE* studies of millions of children proved that they don’t along with Dr. Andrew Wakefield admitting that he lied, The Lancet issuing a retraction, and Dr. Wakefield being stricken from the British Medical Record for knowingly deceiving people. But that’s just me. *smiles with teeth*

What other stupid things like these have you heard people saying?

7 Quick Takes: Migraines, Eye Exams, and Secret Trump Apologists, Oh My!

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7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

*facepalm* Let me explain this in small words so that people understand because apparently, there are people on Facebook who are depriving a village somewhere of their chief idiot:

If your reaction to the news that he’s groped women, harassed them, and treated them horribly is anything other than “that’s horrible!” and possibly “I’m not voting for him” (I’m not saying that you have to like or vote for Hillary)… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

If your reaction to this news is “well, I’ve been dealing with that all my life so why is this any different”, you’re missing the freaking point and… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

If your reaction to the news is to deflect to Bill Clinton and what happened during his administrations, you’re missing the point (yet again) and *surprise surprise*… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST. (And for the record, I was not old enough to vote in the 1992 and 1996 elections so you can stop claiming that I’m responsible for whatever he did.)

If your reaction is to cite 50 Shades of Grey as evidence that women are asking for it, you’re a disgusting human being and (not shockingly)… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

If you’re reaction is to say “yeah, it’s horrible but I’m voting for him anyway”, you need a filter between your mouth and brain and *drumroll*… YOU’RE A TRUMP APOLOGIST.

— 2 —

And speaking of the stupid deflection to 50 Shades of Grey… This meme explains the problem in that logic very succinctly. It also illustrates why I am *INCREDIBLY* proud to have contributed money to the effort to kick Joe Walsh out of office and replace him with the amazingly wonderful Tammy Duckworth. 😀

Joe Walsh is a moron.

— 3 —

And for the record… You are not required to vote for either Trump or Hillary. If you find them both repugnant and are of the opinion that third parties take votes away from your chosen candidate, you have the option of simply not voting for a presidential choice on the ballot. HOWEVER… you *DO* need to vote for someone for the House, Senate (if there’s a Senate race in your state this year), governor, and for any local races because those people do the day-to-day governing. In the case of your House member and your senator, they’re part of one of the checks and balances on the President’s power.

— 4 —

Eye exams. One of the temple pieces on the frames of my glasses snapped on Tuesday and I had to find someone who could do an eye exam because I haven’t seen either an optometrist or ophthalmologist in probably 2 years. (They get pissy if you go in for glasses and your prescription isn’t current.) One local place was able to get me in this afternoon and when they checked my vision, we discovered that my distance prescription on my sunglasses corrects to better than 20/20 in terms of reading as well. As I’ve had reading glasses for 23 years and bifocals for 22 of them, this was a surprise. It’s also another sign that my vision improved after the HELLP Syndrome which is almost unheard of — usually, women have to get a stronger prescription for their vision after having it.

— 5 —

The timing is impeccable. Can I just tell you how fun it is to have an eye exam while dealing with a migraine? It’s just fabulous. The tech and the optician were both apologizing for putting stuff in my eyes and shining lights in because light sensitivity is one of my migraine symptoms.

— 6 —

Stormy weather. The Pacific Northwest is supposed to get hit with several *MASSIVE* storms this weekend with insane winds and atmospheric pressures that are apparently reminding one forecaster of what was seen during the 1962 Columbus Day storm that killed 46 people. (My Practical Accounting professor had me look it up during class today because I was bored and done checking my homework. It’s nice to be useful.)

I and the rest of God’s country would appreciate it if you’d keep us in prayer that there are no fatalities and no widespread power losses.

— 7 —

A kindred spirit. You know your professor is a kindred spirit when you get all the references to literature, movies, and TV shows that she throws into quizzes/pre-tests/tests. Our last test had the business owners named after characters on The Office and our pre-test for the chapter test this coming Monday had names from Pride and Prejudice.

For more Quick Takes, visit Kelly at This Ain’t The Lyceum.

31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs: ID Bracelets

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31 Days of Parenting Kiddos with Special Needs

Good news: The nice people at Dayspring want to give one of you fabulous people a $100 gift card. I know that a gift card like that would *TOTALLY* pay for my yearly Christmas cards. 🙂 Go on over to yesterday’s post for the Rafflecopter.

Even better news: I figured out how to get my Desktop back after the [insert expletives] at the Evil Empire decided that it would be a *FABULOUS* idea to put my laptop in tablet mode after doing the Anniversary Update. This makes my life *SO* much easier than it has been for the last 2-3 weeks because I have my desktop, my taskbar, and the ability to layer windows back. I’m trying to work through my intense fury before I send my feedback to the lackeys at the EE’s headquarters in Redmond because they have MAJORLY inconvenienced me for the last few weeks.

So… today’s topic from “the cheater entry list” is ID bracelets for kiddos. If you have one who is non-verbal like my Daniel, this is important. These two are my favorite companies.

Road ID: I discovered them two years ago and Daniel is on his second one. (We’ve moved a few times.) One feature I love is that you can get the Interactive version of the nameplate which puts a code on the back that a first responder can call into a 1-800 number and have access to every bit of your medical information so that they have all your medications and drug allergies when they’re taking you to the hospital. A lot of hikers, backpackers, and runners use them and the whole concept came when someone had an accident and couldn’t communicate with the first responders. Additionally, they let designate a charity to whom they’ll donate part of your purchase price (you can pick between around 9 of them). I seriously cannot say enough good about them and they have been wonderful in terms of customer service.

Alert Me Bands: We switched to this one a year ago (before switching back to Road ID after this last move) after a friend pointed it out to me on Facebook. It’s a similar concept to Road ID and the bracelet we had for Daniel was similar to this one. (I added one in about Daniel being non-verbal and having asthma.)