Jen of Blag Hag had an interesting post on being the token atheist at a grad student gathering for her program. (Why yes… I’m a fan of the blog of an avowed and vocal atheist. Is there a problem here?)

I don’t have to purposefully hide parts of my life because I’m afraid it’ll alienate people from me. Last night I was sure as hell not going to mention how most of my blogging is about atheism and as aggressive as Dawkins, or that I founded a club for atheist students, or that I was on the board for the Secular Student Alliance. And when someone asked how I had met Richard Dawkins, I didn’t mention how we’re being published together in the same book about atheism. I lied by omission about something I’m incredibly proud about.

Immediately afterward I felt bad for not being true to myself, but these are going to be my coworkers for the next five years. I don’t bring up religion or my atheism in class or at work because I don’t want it to be an issue, just as I try not to bring up politics. But when it is brought up, I’m not the type to stand there and take it. And thus I feel like the odd woman out.

I can relate to her situation in that I dealt with similar situations when I was in college because I’d be the token Christian at a gathering or in one of my classes. I had more than one class where people would criticize me for believing the way I did and in a few cases, the professor encouraged it! I had people tell me that I was a fundamentalist, that everything I believe is intolerant of others, and that I shouldn’t be in my degree program (at that time Biology) because I obviously didn’t believe in evolution. (Actually, I see no problem between Genesis and evolutionary theory.) There were times when I just kept my mouth shut because it just wasn’t worth the aggravation to try and correct people and tell them what I *actually* believe and that their stereotype didn’t quite fit me. For example, I’m respectful that not everybody believes the same way I do. My parents aren’t Christian and while my dad is very passionately anti-religious, my mom raised me to be respectful of the beliefs of others. While I do hope in my heart that my words and actions reflect Christ, I can also talk shop with pretty much every other faith group there is.

Jen’s issue was that she brought up that she’s a fan of Richard Dawkins who is pretty outspoken about his atheism. I can understand people being turned off by him just as I can completely understand people being turned off by the late Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson. When people make derogatory remarks about other faiths and are aggressive about it, it can really turn people off even if they do happen to share a belief system. I have to deal with the crap that “fundamentalist” Christians pull which include all the stupid remarks about Islam made after 9/11 as well as being lumped into the same group as the moron in Florida who wanted to burn the Qur’an on 9/11, endangering US troops in Afghanistan and created a really negative view of the US in the eyes of Muslims abroad. It’s the problem with militancy — Muslims are branded as terrorists because of the actions of a small minority, any pro-life Christian is viewed to be in league with those who bomb abortion clinics or shoot doctors, and atheists are viewed as intolerant because people like Madalyn Murray-O’Hair were that way. Militants make the rest of us look really bad.

Jen goes on to talk about how she was totally comfortable with the people who are part of Seattle Atheists because she could just be herself. Truthfully, I’m a little jealous because I don’t always have that luxury when I get together with a group of Christians, even those who are Episcopalian or Lutheran. There always seems to be something wrong with me like I believe homosexuality is a sin, I wear too much black, I don’t believe that all Muslims are terrorists (I’ve been treated better by Muslim groups than I have by churches I’ve attended), or I’m not what people envision a pastor’s wife to be. (There’s another post topic — unreal expectations for clergy spouses.) I think the only gatherings where I’m comfortable and able to be myself (though I don’t mention my blog) are the stitch n’ b*tch groups I’ve been part of.

It’s also kind of interesting that Jen would run into that problem (being the token atheist) in her program because she’s in the Genome Studies program at the University of Washington — a program where you’d expect there to be a number of non-theists and in a state (and city) where you wouldn’t find a massive evangelical Christian presence like you would in Indiana where Jen is from. Washington is the most unchurched state in the nation — you’d think *I* would be the minority, not her.

I guess my point is this: stereotyping hurts people just like militancy does. They create a false image of what people may look like and makes it harder for those who don’t fit that mold. Jen and I are polar opposites in a lot of ways but we both want a place where we belong and those who represent their faith in seemingly intolerant ways make it harder for us to find those places.

Jen, you’re totally welcome at my blog. I’ll even let you skip over any entries on faith.