(reposted from Agape and Afghan-Making)

Few situations make me as uncomfortable as being a newcomer in a church where I know nothing and no one. Everyone else knows when to stand and sit and bow and smile, and everyone else has someone to talk to during coffee hour, and there I stand, awkward and ill at ease, my inner introvert yelling at me to go home and curl up with a novel. (This is especially torturous in Episcopal churches, which insist upon the theologically sound but socially hideous ritual of “passing the peace.” Right after the Prayers of the People and rght before the announcements, the Episcopal worshipper is required to turn to a neighbor, shake a hand, and say, “May the peace of the Lord be with you.” If you know your fellow worshippers, this is a nice chatting break in the middle of the service. If you do not, you feel like a loser.)
–“Mudhouse Sabbath” by Lauren F. Winner

Crystal asked me to muse about being a convert to Christianity. (Short story: Came to Christ at age 14 from a non-Christian family and am now a pastor’s wife 10 years later.) This was the best quote I could find to describe the dilemma I faced as a convert: having to learn the rituals and moves that were very natural to everyone else and completely unknown to me.

(Short rant on Lauren Winner: I loooooooove her because she’s a convert like me, she came to faith in the Anglican Church (same as me), and she says things the exact same way that I would. Best of all, she has a blog!!! /end rant)

I came to faith in the Episcopal Church (like Winner) and the church I attended thankfully had people who were willing to explain things to me and make me feel like a part of a big family. It was really strange for the first 6 months because I was slowly meeting people and getting to know them and it wasn’t until I joined the choir that I started really feeling a part of things.

When I got to college, I joined a Conservative Baptist church attended by a lot of my fellow IV peeps and it was another style of worship to learn. I had imprinted on the Episcopal Church which had all the standing/kneeling/bowing/sitting and the contemporary service at High Street had people raising their hands in the air to worship and clapping and all. Instead of liturgy, it was a freeform service with a loooooong sermon. Ultimately, I settled at an LCMS congregation in Santa Cruz which had both the emphasis on the Word and liturgy. I think it was the first time I actually knew what to do and when to do it when I walked into a church that wasn’t my tradition!

While I didn’t stay LCMS, I did stay in the liturgical tradition. As a convert, I had to learn where it was that I fit in the grand scheme of the Body. I discovered that I *like* all those old hymns and I *love* having a service that is done the same way and with the same words all over the world — it gives me a sense of connection with my fellow sisters and brothers in Christ in far-off lands.

So… that was my convert dilemma. What are some of yours?