Category Archives: Ministry

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: August 13, 2014

Posted on by

Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY August 13, 2014

Outside my window… warm. The city is repaving streets so there are asphalt trucks and workers out.

I am thinking… about Daniel’s IEP this afternoon. His school situation got fixed kind of amazingly on Monday and I’m dealing with someone in another school district who is actually treating me (and Daniel) like a person and not like a problem they’d like to make disappear.

I am thankful… for the weekend with my parents and for drama-free drives up and back by myself with Daniel.

In the kitchen… Jon is making himself lunch. I had elevenses so I’m not thinking about food-type stuff for a few hours yet.

I am wearing… charcoal shirt and tan khaki capri cargo pants.

I am praying for… some special intentions, discernment about our next step in ministry, and that this afternoon’s IEP goes well.

I am going… hopefully nowhere tomorrow.

I am reading… A New Kind of Christian by Brian McLaren. While I was up in San Jose, I also read a couple murder mysteries: Cutwork by Monica Ferris (meh) and Death by Design, a three-pack of murder mysteries by Laura Childs which was good enough that I just requested the other books in the series from the library.

I am hoping… Daniel takes a long nap so I can get some writing done.

I am looking forward to… going to an ordination on Saturday.

I am hearing the ticking of the various clocks in the living room.

Around the house… quiet as people take naps or read or do whatever.

From the learning rooms… the usual: letters, numbers, writing, days of the week, months of the year, etc. School starts next week for Daniel and I’ll be happy to be done “homeschooling” so I can start focusing on freelance work again to pay the bills.

A favorite quote for today… “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” — C.S. Lewis

I post this one every couple months but it’s one that resonates well with me.

One of my favorite things… a quiet house.

A few plans for the rest of the week: IEP today, some business calls tomorrow, open house at Daniel’s school on Friday morning, possible date night on Friday night, and heading to an ordination on Saturday.

Hosted by The Simple Woman’s Daybook

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: August 3, 2014

Posted on by

Simple Woman's Daybook

(This is being backdated and posted once I return to a place where I have an Internet connection.)

FOR TODAY August 3, 2014

Outside my window… sunny and probably around 80F.

I am thinking… about the call process we’re in and where we’re currently interviewing.

I am thankful… for my in-laws watching Daniel this weekend and for the time this weekend to rest, read, and take some serious Sabbath time.

In the kitchen… we’re staying in the church’s parsonage and they stocked it with snacks, fruit, and sandwich-making supplies for us.

I am wearing… my Online Debate Team shirt (because there’s totally someone on the Internet who is wrong) and black capri sweats.

I am praying for… clarity in where God is leading us, for healing for people in my family, that Daniel continues to amass new skills, and for some special intentions.

I am going… to fly home to southern California tomorrow.

I am wondering… where God is calling us to next.

I am reading… Theology of the Body for Beginners by Christopher West. I finished Light from Heaven and Home to Holly Springs by Jan Karon while traveling on Friday and read Sugar and Iced by Jen McKinlay last night.

I am looking forward to… seeing Daniel tomorrow when we get home. This is the longest I’ve been away from him ever.

I am hearing the washer at the parsonage rinsing/spinning a load of towels. (I travel with Tide packs so that I can do laundry on the road when needed.)

Around the house… quiet and the washer running.

From the learning rooms… still working on life skills, potty-training, numbers, shapes, letters, colors, days of the week, and months of the year with Daniel so that he can wow his kindergarten teachers this fall.

One of my favorite things… cuddles with Daniel. I’m missing my boy horribly.

A few plans for the rest of the week: flying home tomorrow, catching up on phone calls and Daniel stuff on Tuesday, ICP for the local Regional Center on Thursday, and possibly heading up to see my parents next weekend.

Hosted by The Simple Woman’s Daybook

7 Quick Takes: Leaving on A Jet Plane, Orphan Prayers, and Trader Joe’s.

Posted on by

7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

Leaving on a jet plane. I’m sitting in the Ontario International Airport (California, not Canada) waiting to board a plane for this weekend. Pray for good travel mercies for Jon and I and also for Daniel who is being cared for by my in-laws. It’s the longest I’ve been away from him ever and I’m a bit unnerved. I’m incredibly thankful for my mother-in-law Victoria who is doing the lion’s share for the care.

— 2 —

Control Journal. Earlier this week, I got the idea to make a “control journal” for Daniel like you’d find on the Flylady website. It took me a couple days because I had to take pictures of the steps I take in doing stuff like giving Daniel a breathing treatment and I had to mark up the pictures with instructions but it turned out really well. If you think I should do a post on how I did it, let me know in the comments.

— 3 —

Awesome Trader Joe’s story. I was at Trader Joe’s by myself with Daniel a couple days ago and ended up in a checkout lane next to the automatic doors. Daniel’s stimming behavior is opening/shutting doors so this was a bit too tempting for him and so he made a run for it. In the process of trying to get him back and get my gift card out, I dropped my wallet and everything spilled out. The crew member checking me out looked at me and asked, “Is he autistic?”

“Yes,” I replied.

This crew member immediately grabbed another crew member, told him to watch Daniel for me, and helped me pick up the contents of my wallet and sort it. When all was done, he helped us carry everything to the car and asked me a lot of questions about Daniel and his autism. It turns out that he is a college student studying psychology and he recognized the signs. He made sure we got everything into the car, complimented me on how I was doing this all by myself, and told me that if I ever needed any help like this to just grab another crew member.

So… my deepest thanks to Thomas at the Claremont Trader Joe’s. You seriously made my day.

— 4 —

Why I seriously love Trader Joe’s and will give them my business at any opportunity. My experience in #3 is just the tip of the iceberg. I have never had a bad experience with them ever in the 4 years I’ve shopped there since moving back to the West Coast and part of the reason is that their employees are all really wonderful. They have mini-carts for kids with a “Customer-in-Training” flag on them and they are really helpful for teaching Daniel how to shop at a grocery store and what the names of various types of food are. (It also helps his gait to push the cart rather than riding in one of the big adult ones.) Their corporate culture is very laid back and their headquarters is a very plain two story building in Monrovia. (I interviewed to be one of their database people 4 years ago. I didn’t get the job but I can actually say I’ve interviewed at their corporate headquarters and that I was one of the top 10 candidates for the job out of the hundreds who applied.)

— 5 —

Huh. I checked Jon and I in on the Southwest Airlines site last night and when I got our boarding passes, Jon got position A-16 and I got position B-28. In what universe is that reasonable?!?!?!?

Southwest Airlines, BTW, is incredibly good with Daniel. We flew with them two years ago when Daniel and I went down to surprise my father-in-law for Father’s Day after not seeing him for almost 10 months. (Long story.) They were incredibly helpful in getting him on the plane and giving me help in schlepping everything.

— 6 —

Brett. The family committed to Brett (the adorable child on my sidebar) is in his country meeting him and the other little boy they plan to adopt. Pray for good travel mercies for them and a smooth stay with no bureaucratic hangups.

— 7 —

Another prayer request. Please pray for Hope, the adopted daughter of my friend (and fellow Lutheran pastor’s wife) Dalas. They got her home from her country and she’s currently in the hospital as they try to get her nutritionally stable. Dalas is living at the hospital with her and her two year old son and it’s pretty brutal.

For more Quick Takes, visit Jen at ConversionDiary.Com.

The Type of Pastor’s Wife I Am

Posted on by

I’ve been dealing with a troll for the last couple of weeks who has been using a proxy server and Fake Mail Generator to get past my domain block of them. I’d link them and call them out except that doing so would drive traffic to their site and I’m against being used for free publicity like that. Besides, I really don’t have time to engage their desire to be persecuted by others and to feed their martyr complex.

Anyway, they started leaving me nasty comments several weeks ago (which got altered per my comment policy) and this was among them:

… You, on the other hand, appear to never be able to accept criticism or hear another’s perspective. Gawd – how do you ever manage to survive as a pastor’s wife… or is that why you have to move every couple of years?

Then there was:

Really? Because it seems to me as if you go out of your way to call people names, talk about them behind their back and then twist their words to mean other things. I’m guessing they ride you and your poor hubby out on a rail every couple of years. If there was ever a good example of why priests should remain celibate, you would be exhibit A!

Given that people are pretty surprised that I’m a pastor’s wife when they meet me in person, I thought I’d turn these comments on their head and answer as to what kind of pastor’s wife I am.

A quiet one.

One thing that surprises people who know me online when they meet me in person is how quiet I am. Part of it is that I’m pretty shy, part of it is that I’m a strong introvert, and part of it is that I tend to be pretty irenic as a rule. I have enough of a front row seat to conflict and dysfunction by virtue of being married to someone whose job is to sort it out and thus I really don’t desire to seek it out on my own. I’m also quite aware that I need to keep on peoples’ good sides because they pay my husband’s salary and provide our housing. Not pointing out hypocrisy means that I tend to stay out of trouble.

An invisible one.

The best thing I ever did was get a job 60 miles from home because it meant that I had an excuse not to be at every single church event. Now that I have Daniel, I really can’t go to everything or stay after a certain point because of him on the occasions when I do make it to a special church dinner or service. I’ve been asked frequently what I do as a pastor’s wife and the answer is: “be married to the pastor”. That’s it. There are some things I *like* doing and some areas which fit my gifts but I’m not a hugely visible presence these days.

A secret keeper.

I’m privy to a large amount of information because I’m married to Jon. Without trying, I hear from people about all the dirt happening in the parish because people either tell me or I overhear phone calls. I’ve had a number of people try to get me to spill on what I’ve heard about someone and my answer is usually that I know nothing about that and that I don’t want to know. Anything I hear stays with me unless it falls under the mandatory reporting category, at which point the proper authorities will be notified. (Jon is a mandatory reporter and I am by extension.)

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go pop some popcorn to eat while sitting back and watching my troll self-destruct. Later days, y’all!

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: July 27, 2014

Posted on by

Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY July 27, 2014

Outside my window… sunny and bright. According to Weather.Com, it’s 96F here right now. Ugh.

I am thinking… about my upcoming trip this weekend and what I’ll need to pack for it.

I am thankful… for my mother-in-law who is watching Daniel so I can take a breather and blog.

In the kitchen… nothing as of yet though my mother-in-law did make some stuffed peppers yesterday that looked pretty good.

I am wearing… green v-neck shirt and khaki shorts that I’ll have to replace this week as they’ve gotten a few small holes from being washed and worn so much.

I am praying for… my trip this weekend. It will be the longest I’ve been away from Daniel since his birth five years ago.

I am going… to Kohl’s in a bit to go shopping for shorts.

I am wondering… about what will be unfolding in the next few weeks.

I am reading… Light from Heaven by Jan Karon. It’s the last of the books in her series “The Mitford Years”. Next on my agenda are the first two in her “Father Tim” series in preparation for the book that will be coming out later this year. After that, I’ll read Sugar and Iced by Jenn McKinlay.

I am hoping… we get more consistent results with potty-training this week.

I am looking forward to… seeing what God may be calling us to.

I am hearing the A/C and my mother-in-law cleaning in the kitchen.

Around the house… it is now 5 hours after I started writing this, night has fallen, and people are heading to bed.

From the learning rooms… potty-training, reviewing shapes/numbers/letters/colors, learning to write letters and numbers, reading books, and working on life skills.

A favorite quote for today… “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” — C.S. Lewis

One of my favorite things… Daniel’s laugh when we play “Ring Around the Rosy” with my in-laws.

A few plans for the rest of the week: A peds appointment at some point for Daniel to get his cough checked out (and establish care here), various errands, and a flight out to my undisclosed location with Jon on Friday.

A peek into my day… Here’s one of the pictures of the sanctuary of the Cathedral of Our Lady of the Angels that I took last week after the Mass for Immigrants that I attended. It’s an amazing space and all of it is tastefully designed. Some of these tapestries were used for the cover of My Life with the Saints by Fr. James Martin, S.J.

A shot of the tapestries on one side of the sanctuary of the Cathedral of Our Lady of the Angels in downtown LA

Hosted by The Simple Woman’s Daybook

7 Quick Takes: Autism Boot Camp, My House Panther, and the Giants Are #1

Posted on by

7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

News on Brett. Brett’s family is overseas meeting him and Randall (the other child they’ll be adopting) right now. Pray for good travel mercies for them.

— 2 —

Amusing cat news. My mother-in-law has a nickname for Edda (my black cat): Bellatrix after Bellatrix Lestrange in the Harry Potter books. The reason: Bellatrix’s maiden name was Black. (She was a cousin of Sirius Black.) It fits Edda to a T. My little black cat has also become a little black bully and is antagonizing one of my in-laws’ tabbies who is living outside. I’ve been trying to tell her that she needs to be nice as she is a guest in their home. CATS!

— 3 —

Daniel news. My mother-in-law and I have embarked on a project to catch Daniel up as much as we can before he starts school for the fall. We went to Lakeshore Learning last Saturday and got some posters and books and are working with him throughout the day. We’re also working on life skills and adaptive learning so my little munchkin is dealing with potty-training boot camp and also things like learning how to drink out of a regular cup. So far, we’ve got the drinking from a cup memorized and we’ve managed to teach him days of the week/months of the year/how to use a calendar without any of the insipid songs/videos that his home teacher from the school district used.

— 4 —

Thoughts on Homeschooling. As I’m “homeschooling” right now, I’m kind of looking suspiciously at some homeschooling moms who talk about how they don’t want to send their kids to public school because they’ll miss out on all the stuff like reading Beatrix Potter with them and reading all the great literary classics in high school. Guess what? My mom worked full-time, sent us to private school (K-5) and public school (6-college)… and still did all of that with us. It’s called “being an involved parent”. Seriously, if you want to be a housewife, be a housewife and own that decision. Just please don’t try to rationalize your life decisions by using your kids as a pawn.

And for those who might surf on here and start a flame war about how I hate homeschoolers, my mother-in-law homeschooled my husband and sister-in-law from K-12. The woman has an “anything-they-can-do-I-can-do-better” attitude toward the public school system… and she *did* do it better. Both of them graduated high school at age 15, graduated college at 20, and have Master’s degrees in their fields. Believe me, I know a pretty decent spectrum of homeschoolers and homeschooling parents; but there are some parents who I just don’t respect because they’re living vicariously through their kids.

— 5 —

Baseball. My boys are #1 in their division and are 1.5 games ahead of the Dodgers. (They’re like 11.5 games ahead of the other teams in the NL West.) *sticks her tongue out at her husband* I’m hoping my boys keep doing well. Another World Series title would be lovely this October.

— 6 —

Summer in the desert. It was 104F today. *sighs* I hate heat. It’s why I never went to the state fair when I was living up north — it was always over 90F and I had no desire to walk around when it was that hot. I love four distinct seasons and am kind of hoping that we’re called to a place that has them for Jon’s next parish.

— 7 —

Speaking of such things… The circumstances around my “special intention” are heating up so please pray that things keep moving in a positive direction. Thanks!

For more Quick Takes, visit Carolyn at Svellerella who is guest-hosting this week while Edel is going on.

The Simple Woman’s Daybook: Mass for Immigration Edition

Posted on by

Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY July 21, 2014

Outside my window… dark. It’s almost 1 a.m. It was a long day and I’m finally getting to blog this.

I am thinking… about what I’ll be doing with Daniel in a few hours when I have to get up.

I am thankful… that I got to go to the Mass in Recognition of All Immigrants at the Cathedral of Our Lady of the Angels.

In the kitchen… nothing at the moment but I’m pretty sure there will be something cooking/baking tomorrow.

I am wearing… my Momcat shirt and running shorts.

I am praying for… the children being deported after being separated from their families and sent north to cross the border to escape the poverty and violence of their home countries.

I am going… to Target tomorrow for some things.

I am wondering… some things about the call processes we’re currently in at the moment.

I am reading… In This Mountain by Jan Karon. It’s a hard read for me because Fr. Tim is dealing with serious depression and I know it all too well.

I am hoping… I sleep restfully tonight.

I am hearing my “Bach and Chant” playlist on iTunes. Currently, it’s the Benedictines of Mary, Queen of Apostles.

Around the house… it’s silent as everyone else is asleep including the kitties.

I am pondering… too many things in my heart which is why I’m up blogging.

A favorite quote for today… “If you are interested enough to have read thus far you are probably interested enough to make a shot at saying your prayers: and, whatever else you say, you will probably say the Lord’s Prayer. Its very first words are Our Father. Do you now see what those words mean? They mean quite frankly, that you are putting yourself in the place of a son of God. To put it bluntly, you are dressing up as Christ. If you like, you are pretending. Because, of course, the moment you realise what the words mean, you realise that you are not a son of God. You are not being like The Son of God, whose will and interests are at one with those of the Father: you are a bundle of self-centred fears, hopes, greeds, jealousies, and self-conceit, all doomed to death. So that, in a way, this dressing up as Christ is a piece of outrageous cheek. But the odd thing is that He has ordered us to do it.” — C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

One of my favorite things… quiet. It’s a rarity with a five year old boy.

A few plans for the rest of the week: working with Daniel on school stuff as well as whatever errands are thrown into the mix.

A peek into my day… *cues the “What I Wore on Sunday” script*

I got permission to join Jon and his dad for the Mass at the cathedral on Sunday afternoon and his dad pulled some strings to get me into the “reserved” seating. I knew that receiving the Eucharist at Mass would be off-limits to me as a non-Catholic so I made plans to go to a normal worship service where I could commune this morning wearing my outfit from last week (which has been washed since).

My Sunday morning worship attire.

Dress and camisole: Kohl’s
Shoes: Naturalizer

When my father-in-law told me that I’d be sitting in the reserved section, I thought that it meant that I’d be able to get a seat in the sanctuary instead of being in the overflow outside on the plaza. (I’m on Cipro at the moment so direct sunlight is no bueno until Wednesday.) Little did I know that I’d be up on the raised part of the altar platform in the front row of one of the sections with the “ecumenical guests”. Even more surprising to me was when I was introduced with the “ecumenical guests” by name and people were applauding for me as well as flashbulbs going off. (I joke about marrying into the “Lutheran mafia” because Jon is a 4th generation pastor; but my father-in-law *IS* a big deal in the ecumenical community and this was a rare look for me into his world.) I leaned over to the diocese’s ecumenical officer who was sitting next to me and told him that I was so NOT worthy of this. His answer: “Yes you are.”

Me outside the cathedral with the cornerstone.

Shirt: Kohl’s
Slacks: Kohl’s
Shoes: Naturalizer
Sunglasses: Nike (they’re prescription ones — one of the best investments I’ve ever made)

The Mass was amazing. It was half in English and half in Spanish and I was thankful to be familiar with Catholic liturgy because I’m probably the only native Californian who doesn’t speak Spanish. (I can read it passably but I can’t understand it when it’s spoken.) It was definitely “smells and bells” worship with a very zealous thurifer (the person swinging the thurible with the incense). The priest proclaiming the Gospel was so clouded in incense that he looked hazy from probably 10 feet away where I was sitting. The archbishop preached half in English and half in Spanish and it was an excellent sermon. There were also the relics of St. Toribio Romo González who was martyred in the Cristero War with some ranking Knights of Columbus guarding the statue with the relics in it. (They did not have their swords but they still looked pretty impressive.)

The tapestries from where I was sitting.

At the end of the Mass, the archbishop came to greet all of the “ecumenical guests” and speak with us individually. I’m glad I asked how to address him before that point (answer: “Your Grace”) and I was flattered that I was able to meet him. The picture above was taken afterwards once people were leaving — it would have been offensive to take pictures during Mass.

My necklace.

The story of my necklace: A family friend and her family were missionaries in Afghanistan in the 1980’s and the beads are the famous blue glass of Herat. She doesn’t have any daughters or daughter-in-laws so she made me the necklace from the beads for my 30th birthday in 2010. It’s the equivalent of receiving the family jewels and given my heart for the Afghan people (and for their food), I was honored to receive it.

Now go see Holly and the other pretties at Fine Linen and Purple.

Hosted by The Simple Woman’s Daybook